Stained Promises
by KlaineGMH
Summary: He gasped softly, not disturbing the horrific scene in front of him. He turned on his heel as fast as he could and left that house, that lie, that pain, in a storm of tears unable to rid his mind of Sebastian and Blaine kissing and laughing watching RENT together: Their movie. With their marriage on their line can Kurt learn forgiveness.
1. Now and Forever, or maybe not

Fumbling with the his keys as the exhaustion from the day took over, Kurt's mind fell into a blank haze, not even realizing that he had opened the door and was still standing at the threshold. His mind eventually swam back to reality and he stepped sluggishly into the house dropping his coat at the door. He took a moment to admire his decorating skills and remembered back to when he and his husband had purchased this home.

"_It is absolutely perfect, Blaine, and I want to spend the rest of my life in it with you." Kurt cooed. He step up behind his husband and wrapped his arms around his waist and put his chin on the shoulder._

"_As long as I have you everything is perfect, baby." Blaine whispered back to him, sinking into his arms and feeling their heartbeats become one. He turned slowly in his husband arms and met his eyes. He swam into the blue of his eyes and gently met his lips with his husband's. The kiss was gentle full of love and compassion not lust or desire. At that moment nothing else matter, it was only them._

He sighed in pure happiness and stepped around the corner into the living room, where he only wished he could die then and there. His heart broke in two and his mind shattered. He gasped softly, not disturbing the horrific scene in front of him. He turned on his heel as fast as he could and left that house, that lie, that pain in a storm of tears unable to rid his mind of Sebastian and Blaine kissing and laughing watching RENT together: Their movie.

"_Every day I walked down the street I hear people say baby SO SWEET!" Blaine belted out with Maureen as RENT played across the scene._

_Kurt smiled as his boyfriend, his heart ready to overflow with the love. He melted back further into his boyfriend's embrace, until he was firm against his chest. If he was to have die then and there it would have been okay. As the credits rolled onto the television, Blaine scooped Kurt off the couch and led him to the backyard where the stars had just come out to play and the lanterns on the deck, set the mood of romance perfectly._

"_Blaine, baby, what's going on?" Kurt responded in an honest state of confusion._

"_What I can't look at the stars with my beautiful boyfriend?" Blaine replied lovingly. _

_Kurt scoffed and turned his nose up, which elicited a laugh from his boyfriend in response. When Kurt's façade finally crumpled he turn back to see Blaine one knee and love in his honey eyes._

"_Kurt Hummel from the moment I met you, you have been my everything. You have humbled me when I became conceited me. You have loved me when I felt unwanted. Kurt- Words can't begin to describe you. Amazing, beautiful, talented, smart, courageous, caring, and generous. And the list just goes on." Tears had started to fall and the amount of love surrounded the two of them would have nearly choked anyone else. "I want to spend the rest of life, trying to describe you. I want to spend that rest of life, loving you. I will hold you when you're scared and I will nurse you when you're sick. I will be everything you need and want if you will take me. I am so in love with you Kurt, and nothing and no one will ever change that. Kurt Elizabeth Hummel, will you do me the honor of becoming my husband."_

_No words needed to be exchanged, Blaine already knew the answer. Kurt pulled his fiancé to his feet and crashed their lips together._

"_Now and forever." Kurt whispered into Blaine ears as he drew apart for air. A shiver ran down Blaine's back and he fell deeper in love with man standing in front of him._

"Seb, I think you better go, Kurt should be home soon." Blaine stated simply lifting his legs off of Sebastian's lap.

"Ughhh, stupid husbands, when are you going to ditch the bitch, and go for the real King?" Sebastian replied with a smirk.

Blaine only sighed in response, prompting Sebastian to leave, knowing that Blaine wasn't in the mood to talk.

Blaine waited until the door closed till he made his way to the shower. He paused at the mirror to look at the man staring back at him. He was disgusted. This wasn't him. _Wrong it is you now-_ the voice at the back of his head nagged. He slammed the door shut and stripped his clothing off, wanting, NEEDING, to relieve some of this filthiness. The shower, however, did little to wash away the guilt and it did nothing to comfort the liar he had become.

As the clock neared nine Blaine became worried because the latest Kurt got back was 8:30._What if something has happened to him? Where is he? He should have called._ Blaine's mind was thrown into a hurricane of discomforting thoughts and ideas that almost brought his to tears. He ran swiftly to the living room where his phone was sitting on the coffee table. He almost couldn't stand to be in this room, knowing what he had done, he was starting to suffocate but his thoughts snapped back to Kurt. He gathered his phone and went to send him a text, but before he could, the phone had dropped out of his hand and crashed onto the table, and tears rimmed his line.  
He knew.

He ran to the bedroom locking himself in leaving his cell phone laying on the table with the message:

From Kurt: Why don't you ask Sebastian where I am?- still lighting up the screen.


	2. Let's pretend I'm okay

_**Kurt's morning after he found out about the affair, please prompt, I have a way I am thinking about taking this story but I open to any and all comments. But please be nice. **_

_**Anyway enjoy xoxox**_

_**And don't forget reviews=oxygen**_

The rays of the sun finally reached his car, waking Kurt from his restless sleep. He sat up abruptly smacking his head against the car door.

"Shit." He murmured to himself, just another pain to add to his already aching, sleep deprived body. His aching head, his aching stomach and most of all his aching heart pulled him away from reality and into replays of last night. They were kissing, more like sucking each other's faces off while RENT played. That sounded exactly like the night Blaine had proposed. He didn't even notice he had started to cry and he crashed his head down against the wheel, sending it off on a loud honk that startled him, and brought his thoughts back to the present. Not only had he cheated, but with Sebastian of all people. Sebastian had been a sore topic in their marriage and Kurt had voiced his opinions on the matter to Blaine before.

_As the clock turned its big hand to grab the 11, Kurt heard the front door close and open and he heard the shuffling of his husband's feet as he propelled towards the bedroom. Blaine entered the dark room and proceeded to strip down to his boxers or at least pajama pants because when he felt Blaine crawl behind him in bed he was shirtless. Blaine reached out to drape his hand over his husband's waist but Kurt flinched away, rolling onto his stomach._

"_Babe, what's wrong?" Even though Kurt couldn't see them, he knew those hazel eyes showed confusion and hurt._

"_Nothing, absolutely nothing." Kurt scoffed sarcastically, trying to hide his own pain. "But mind telling me why my husband is coming home at 11, and I received no text or call or anything, and you didn't bother picking up my call." _

"_I told you I had dinner with Sebastian tonight. We were hashing out some trial tactics for the next trial. I never answer my phone during work, you know that" Blaine answered defensively._

"_Hmm, okay, right, no see I remember that but I don't remember is in what world does dinner last till 11." Kurt's tone practically indicating accusation and suspicion. _

"_We had to get the brief done tonight, I'm sorry, you are right I should have called, I just get so caught up with work." Blaine pleaded his voice dripping with apologetic tone._

"_You have "Work Dinners" with Sebastian every other god damn night. Maybe I want to have dinner with you. I shouldn't have to share you with Sebastian."_

"_God you are being selfish Kurt, I am trying to do my job, are you jealous of Sebastian. Jesus Kurt I can't believe you think so little of me."_

"_Maybe if I felt like your first choice instead of a booty call to come to at 11 at night, I wouldn't." He breathed in deeply. "Do you remember 10 years ago when Sebastian you and I were at Lima Bean and you stepped away to get coffee, right then he told me you were too good for me. I have spent our entire relationship trying to believe he was wrong but the more time you spend with him, the more I think he is right and it kills me inside." Kurt tried to be completely honest about his own insecurities. "When it seems like you want to spend more time with him than me and don't even come home till 11, how am I suppose too feel, I don't want to lose you but I feel like I am." He sobbed as his confession came to a close_

_Blaine purposely ignored Kurt's flash to past because he know understood why Kurt was angry but Blaine wasn't one that liked to be wrong and he would fight even when he was but now he was going to regret it. "You are being ridiculous. "Maybe I want to have Dinner with my husband."" Blaine repeated mocking Kurt's voice. "You do have dinner with me." But this battle was lost, the moment he mocked Kurt's voice, Kurt saw red, he didn't hear anything else Blaine had to say and his mind spun out of control. He wanted to scream and punch and kick but he remained still. Kurt had just poured out his heart to Blaine and stab Kurt in the heart, he wanted to die._

_Silence, was all that Blaine was answered with and he reached out to touch Kurt's arm before he jumped back violently and when their eyes met, Blaine could see all his tears. "Don't touch me." Kurt screamed._

"_Fuck. I just made fun of his voice, the thing he was tormented for as a kid. Fuck I am so damn stupid." Blaine thought to himself. _

"_Just have fun on your work dinners, don't worry about me, your husband, I can take of myself even though I sound like a girl." Kurt spat at Blaine his tone vicious but concealing so much pain._

_Kurt stood up and ran to the door opening it and standing at the door before turning to Blaine locking his gaze with his husband's, " I hate you." He stated simply and slammed the door._

_On his next work dinner the affair started. The only words he could remember were "I hate you." (But of course Kurt doesn't know this he only knows that he saw Blaine and Sebastian last night.)_

He pulled his phone out of the glove box and unlocked the screen staring into 10 missed calls and 11 new texts. He deleted each and every text without giving them a second glance. The entire process tears streamed down his face and soft whimpers left his body. After a good 20mins of crying he pulled his seat up and called Rachel. After working out spending tonight at her apartment, he which he had done through a quite convincing string of lies he looked in the mirror and frowned deeply at it.

"What the hell did I do wrong?" He croaked hoarsely to his audience of no one. Anger overtook his body and all sense left him as he crashed his left forearm into the driver side window shattering the glass and cutting up his arm.

The clock read 6:52 and he knew he needed to be at work in 30mins, so he pushed everything out of his mind becoming a numb empty shell. He got his extra clothes out of the car, drove to the gym where he showered and clean of his arm and then walked into his job with no vestiges of pain or hatred.


	3. Regret

_**I don't write smut because I'm not good at it**_

_**Let's see what happens when Kurt finds Sebastian again in their house. That touchy, sensitive Kurt might just leave us.**_

_**Please, please review. You will get a virtual cookie.**_

_**I don't own Glee….. sadnessssssss! **_

His hand slide across the table he was slumped in front of, sending the empty whiskey bottle clattering to floor loudly. He woke with a jump, yelling out in pain as his entire body convulsed. The light pouring into the room nearly blinded him and no coherent images could be form as his mind swirled. He muscles ached from the position of his alcohol induced sleep. Many tried and failed attempts later, he managed to trek his way to the shower. His vision still blurred and his mind still numb from the copious amounts of alcohol he consumed last night. He stripped his clothes off before stepping into the shower, where he collapsed to the shower floor, unable to withstand the aches of his body anymore. As the cold water splashed over his body, his mind cleared ever so slightly, to only remind him of the horror of the night before.

Kurt knew. He knew. But did he know how long it had been going on for?

He slammed his fist into the shower wall send sparks of erratic pain throughout his body. He yelped loudly and proceeded to end the shower. He stepped out of the shower just in time to catching the phone ringing.

"Hello?" His groggy voice spoke out.

"Blaine, you sound terrible man. Where are you, it's 10?" Blaine turned his to neck to see that indeed it was ten and he was 2 hours late to work.

"Sorry, Seb I am sick as a dog. I can't come in today." Blaine responded his mind frazzled from the exchange of coherent sentences.

"Alright, well please take care of yourself, and get rid of it because I don't want you sharing it with me." He smirked and hung up the phone.

Blaine swigged down 2 Advil's and crashed down into the couch, where the memories of the night the affair started pushed to front of his brain

"_Blaine, what's wrong, you are all over the place right now." Sebastian said to Blaine with a sincere smile._

"_He hates me, he hates me.. hates… me." He whispered to himself forgetful of the presence near him._

"_Who hates you? No one could hate you, you are too adorable and intelligent and caring." He cooed his cheeks coloring, he slight crush on Blaine coming to the surface._

_Blaine met Sebastian's gaze and growled, "Kurt doesn't think so. He hates me."_

"_Well whatever happened, he's wrong, you are amazing." Sebastian stated moving closer to Blaine and draping his hand over his exhausted co-worker's shoulder. Sebastian had always liked Blaine from the moment he saw him, and Sebastian was a persistent person but he was always a cruel person who must have had a dark past because he took every opportunity to hurt others and no was no different, he would break apart another marriage and smile while doing it._

_Blaine sighed in discontent and Sebastian made his move, he brought Blaine's chin up to confront his eyes and leaned and kissed him. Blaine froze in surprise and panic but started kissing back, pushing Kurt out of his mind. He pushed all the fights and lies out of his conscience and betrayed all the trust Kurt had in him._

_Sebastian pulled away with a light smack. "Kurt doesn't deserve you, let me make you feel better he said with a wink. And Blaine fell for the trap. Alone, angry and hurt he destroyed his vows and stained his promises and he could never take that back._

He teetered between consciousness and sleep as a cold material covered his eyes relaxing some of the pain in his mind and he felt a blanket being pulled up over him. He felt safe and loved momentarily, and his body almost stopped aching.

"K—Kurt." He called out, subconsciously longing for the man he loved to be there.

"No silly, it is Sebastian, I came over to take care of you because you sounded horrid on the phone."

"Oh thanks, Seb, yeah I do feel like shit today, I have probably just been working too hard." Blaine explained.

"You do work way too hard. Get some sleep. I'll be here when you wake up." He picked up Blaine's feet and sat down pulling Blaine's legs over his lap.

Blaine sleep was uneasy and restless and meanwhile Sebastian had also drifted off to sleep, but the alarm clock they got was nothing to look forward to.

"Hey Shirley, I'm running out to go to a friend's for lunch." Kurt lied passing his secretary on his way to his house to grab clothes to keep at Rachel's.

"Will do, remember be back at 4 for you appointment with Vogue Mr. Hummel." Shirley belted after him in response.

The drive home was short but seemed to stretch on for hours, he didn't want to step one foot in the place, but he needed clothes and he especially needed his hair products. They were his oxygen but that house was like poison every inch of it reminded him of Blaine and what Blaine did. He doesn't even know the extent of things with Sebastian but he knows in his heart it was more than just kissing. He had seen it for months, the expression his face, the guilt in his eyes, but he chose to ignore it but now his brain was screaming it at him and there was no escaping it.

He didn't know Blaine was there. He didn't know Sebastian was there. And he didn't know seeing them on the couch together would make him lose all sensibility. He trudged to the door, unlocked it and step in, quickly making his way to the bedroom but he stop. Froze and looked to the living room.

After moments of pure tension, his voice cut through the room as a scream.

"Isn't that something to come home to?" Kurt spat viciously, waking Blaine and Sebastian who immediately stumbled to their feet. Blaine searched his head for an explanation, but being clearly in the wrong and still a bit hung-over he came up short and he locked his eyes on the floor in defeat.

But this fight was far from over.

_**Comments or ideas for how the fight should go, I'm thinking some Kurt v Sebastian stuff. Let me know pwetty pwease. **_


	4. The One That Got Away

_**And the fight begins **_

"Hey, Blainey, How was your morning?" Kurt sang at Blaine, but deep down the anger rose, pushing against his fragile shell of kindness. "Oh and hey Sebastian, come to destroy all the things that I love?" Sarcasm now dripping on every word he spoke. Kurt was about to break. He had spent some many years of his life, being kind and nice and understanding but no one ever returned the favor and he had more than enough.

Sebastian glanced around completely bewildered not knowing that Kurt had found out about the affair. Silence overtook the room and left Blaine swimming in his guilt. Blaine wasn't prepared for this confrontation and to be honest his head still floated about with the aftermath of the hangover.

"How long?" Kurt's voice flew across the room slapping Blaine in the face, causing him to step backward.

"4 months." Blaine mumbled incoherently towards the cupboard holding the fine china. As his gaze lingered over the cupboard, he saw something fly past him into the china cupboard. The glass shattered and dove towards the floor, each time a piece landed it sounded like an explosion. He rounded his head to look at the man who had just rocketed his keys in the china cupboard one foot away from Blaine's face, and he saw something that made him shrink back in himself. His eyes had turned black with rage and his face had lost any sign of happiness and the only thing that could be read across his face was the pure hatred bubbling inside him. He was disgusted with himself that he caused what he was seeing now, that he changed Kurt into this horrible monster. He had never seen Kurt like this before and they had had their share of fights. He turned to Sebastian pleading with his eyes to help him, but Sebastian diverted his gaze from Blaine. Blaine was terrified and alone and it was his own entire fault.

Sebastian tried to take this moment to slip out of the house, not caring to be in the middle of this argument even though he was the one who started it, but his path was blocked by Kurt who now seemed to loom over him at 8 feet and whose rage could be felt radiating off him.

"Coward." Kurt spat. "Can't even stick around to watch the fight you started. You are a heartless COWARD! And I hope one day you get everything that you deserve. You disgust me. You are a cold-blooded unlovable prick. Get. The. Hell. Out. Of. My. House." He breathed raggedly stepping slightly out of his way to allow just enough room for Sebastian to scramble to the door. As Sebastian reached for the door, Kurt's voice found him. "You are an insecure boy with nothing to live for and no one to love." Tears slipped down his face and he slammed the door closed behind him, knowing Kurt was right.

Kurt came down a little from his heated monologue only to realize guilt had set in his stomach, yes Sebastian deserved that but he became what he despised and now he hated himself for it, but he had bigger problems, like the man standing in the living room whom had given everything to and he had traded it in for a quick fuck.

He didn't turn to face the man but instead talked to the wall.

"Remember when you proposed, you remember your promises. Do you? Because I do. DO you remember the vows at our weddings.. or do those mean nothing." Kurt laughed an empty laugh and turned to lock gazes with the shorter man. Remember back to the day of their wedding, the love in the eyes and now seeing the pain in Blaine's made him almost double over in sadness.

"You are a liar and I can't spend another second dying in your betrayals. You've ruined this house, you've ruined all the memories in them with your games." He sighed deeply trying to prevent the tears that he knew were coming. "Did you have sex with him?" No answer came. "Did you tell him you loved him? Did you tell him you want him more than me?" Kurt's body tensed when he was met with no reply and now he already knew the answer. His head spun and he lost coherent thought. Silence danced around for an endless moment perpetuating the room with tension.

"Kurt—I'm"

"Save it. You can live whatever lie you want, but I refuse to take part, I spent are whole marriage working things out, pushing my feelings to the side but not anymore. I'm done."

Kurt bounded to the bedroom and hurriedly shoved his clothes and belongings in a suitcase. The room smelt of Blaine which made tears rim his eyes. All the memories of Blaine and him in the bedroom all the love and happiness were now replaced with the image of Sebastian and Blaine in their bed together. He slammed the suitcase shut and nearly ran out the room. When he had made his way to the door Blaine's voice reached him. "Where do we go from here?"

"I go right out that door, you—you go back to whatever lie you want to live."

"I won't let you go." Blaine's voice trailed after him as he close the door to his home. His home, the place that felt most sacred, now tainted with the actions of his….. Husband. He wanted to puke. But he wouldn't, he couldn't, he would stay strong and not let Blaine know that this was killing him inside.

As the door closed Blaine crumpled down onto the ground, into a heap of tears. "What have I done?" He yelled at himself as he pulled harshly at his hair. He would fix this, he had to. He would do whatever it took to regain his trust. He loved Kurt and wanted to be with him, but it take so much more than words because he had already broken so many of them before.

"In another life I would be your man, I'd keep all my promises, be us against the world. In another life I would make you stay, so I don't have to say you were the one that got away." Blaine sang through the sobs, his heart wrenching with pain.

Kurt had reached the car before breaking down into tears and sliding now the side of the car. His whole life had crumpled in the period of 3 days and that was more than he could take.

"_**The one that got away- Katy Perry"**_

_**Klaine is Endgame but it will take some time. So the fight scene, what do we think?**_


	5. There for You

_**Not the best Chapter but we needed to dig into some Kurt's feelings. I hate doing this to Kurt. Aghhh, sadness. Anyway, patience my friends, Klaine will be together in the end. But the path to forgiveness isn't always easy. Prompt me with what you want to see from Blaine or Kurt or even Sebastian (ughh).**_

_**To all of you who are supporting this, thank you so much, you don't know what it means to me.**_

_**Enjoy xoxoxox**_

Hurt, Guilt, Hate, Sorrow, Confusion all those feelings swirled around Kurt's head as he trudged up the stairs to Rachel's apartment which was on the top floor and the building had no elevator which left him more time to be alone with his thoughts.

He reached 10E and rapped on the door lightly and Rachel excitedly let him in.

"Hey Kurtie, I was waiting for you." She said all too happily will leading him into the living room. She lived alone and the place was quite nice. She had some decorating skills, nothing compared to Kurt's but it would suffice as long as he didn't have to look at the walls of …. His house "You look horrible… penny for your thoughts?" That's Rachel for you, she's got her nose in everyone's business but she does it because she cares and Kurt has fought with too many people to let this spiral out of control.

"Blaine and I had a fight; no I don't want to talk about it and please don't push me to try to fix it. Just try to keep my mind off of it and Rach thanks so much for letting me stay here, I'm glad I can trust someone." Kurt admitted with a tone of complete deflation. He was exhausted physically and mentally.

"I won't push for now, but you know me." She added with a wink. "But please remember forgiveness is the only way to move on, if not for him then for you. I want to see you happy Kurt, don't let someone steal that from you, you are all too FABLOUS and plus Blaine loves you, you guys will get through this. Love conquers all, come on as a romantic yourself you should know this." She cooed playfully at him. She led him to the guest room and disappeared quickly leaving him to drown further is his thoughts.

As she turned at the end of the hall way he said "you have no idea," more to himself than to her. He scanned the bedroom until he located the dresser where he quietly and hurriedly emptied his clothes into the drawers. As the aches of his body became more apparent he headed for the shower hoping to the hot would do something, anything to erase the pain of that day, but nothing comes that easy. He lethargically got out of the shower, spotting the clock that said 2:30 and he had to be at his appointment at 4. He used the time to meticulously plan his outfit and style his hair just right.

He bolted to the door realizing he was running a bit late, stopping to grab the spare key Rachel had left for him before she left for Wicked Rehearsal. He pulled up in front of his office building and went inside for his meeting.

"Mr. Hummel we'd like to offer you the position of Editor-in- Chief of Vogue." The man sitting across from him stated simply.

Kurt's heart exploded in happiness and glee. The rest of the meeting went over in a haze as Kurt was high on this feeling. After working out some details and dealing with pay range, he left Kurt to his own means in his office. The second the door snapped shut he grabbed for his phone and dialed subconsciously but before he hit send he realized it was Blaine's number and all his happiness toppled over. He also saw that there was a new message from Blaine. _From Blaine: I love you; I know sorry means nothing to you. I know I hurt you and betrayed your trust but I will do anything to get you back. I can't live without you. I was so wrong Kurt. Please give me a second chance._ The text sent sparks to his heart and he realized the one person he wanted to tell the news to was Blaine but he couldn't, well he could but he won't. He clenched the phone to his heart, pain starting to come back from that day. He had just been given the job of his dream but it meant nothing if he couldn't share it with Blaine, nothing meant anything if he didn't have Blaine, but Kurt won't confess to this or even acknowledge it. The hurt he felt simply overtook his capacity to forgive and he went on hating Blaine, dying on the inside. He settled instead on calling his dad, whom he hoped would brighten his mood.

"Hey dad," Kurt called into the phone.

"Hey, Kiddo, How have you been?"

"Dad I'm not a kid anymore I'm 28 and plus guess who just made Editor-In-Chief of Vogue today." Kurt bragged into the phone.

"Kurt! This is exciting, I am so proud of you, and what did Blaine say?" Opps, wrong thing to bring up. Burt was only met with a deep sigh coming from Kurt's end of the line. "Son, what's got your tongue, something up with Blaine and you?"

"Nothing dad, we just had a fight." Kurt lied. He was ashamed to admit that Blaine cheated because it made him feel like he wasn't good enough. Selfish, yes it was but Kurt did it none the less and if Burt found out Blaine might be dead in 24hours and his dad would be on charge for murder. It was a lose-lose situation.

"I know there is something that you are not telling me but you are a grown man and I won't push….Kurt, you are an extraordinary man, and I am so proud to watch you grow up and become such a dignified man. You and Blaine will work everything out. You are so compassionate and kind Kurt. Don't beat yourself over this Kurt, you are amazing and you got this job, that you so deserve and I love you Kurt, no matter what I will never turn my back on you." Burt comforted Kurt through the phone. Kurt's was almost overwhelmed with all the love his dad showed him and he was right his dad did make him feel better.

"I love you dad, thank you, so much, I really needed to hear that." Kurt huffed in reply because in all reality not only did he hate Blaine for what he did but he hated himself for the things he said especially to Sebastian. He had become a bully, for the right reasons, yes, but a bully none the less. He was going to have to apologize sooner or later but he chose later.

As he stumbled into Rachel's apartment completely sleep deprived, after what seemed like an endless day at work mapping out plans and details for his transfer to vogue, he checked his phone for any messages unfortunately stumbling across a text from Blaine.

_From Blaine:_

_Sometimes I'm selfish fake  
You're always a true friend  
And I don't deserve you  
'Cause I'm not there for you  
Please forgive me again_

I wanna be there for you  
Someone you can come to  
Runs deeper than my bones  
I wanna be there for you  
I wanna be there for you

Swirling shades of blue  
Slow dancing in your eyes  
Sun kisses the earth  
And I hush my urge to cry, cry  
I wanna be there for you  
Someone you can come to  
Runs deeper than my bones  
I wanna be there for you  
I wanna be there for you

'Cause I hear the whispered words  
In your masterpiece beautiful  
You speak the unspeakable  
I love you, too

I wanna be there for you  
Someone you can come to

I wanna be there for you  
And be someone you can come to  
The love runs deeper than my bones  
And I, I wanna be there for you

Tears were rolling down his cheeks at this point and he drifted off into a peaceful sleep imagining that everything he said was true, even if it wasn't, he imagined it was.

"_**There for you- Flyleaf"**_

_**So the process begins and also some Burt/Kurt fluff WOOT!**_

_**What are we thinking for the next chapter? Ideas, my lovelies?**_

_**Ohh yas and I don't own Vogue, but that would be awesome if I did and I still don't own Glee. Sad Face ):**_

_**So Sebastian might come into play next chapter, are we thinking Blaine should be mean to him too? I kind of feel bad for the poor guy.**_


	6. Can We Start Over

_**Alright here is the next chapter**_

_**Enjoy xoxo**_

Blaine had managed to make it through the day before without completely breaking down, but only cause he had to stay strong. He needed to win Kurt back and it was going to focus all his energy on this, but as luck would have it, things don't always go off without a hitch.

Blaine gulped down his orange juice, before reaching for his phone to call Rachel which is where Kurt was staying most likely but he was interrupted by the sound of knuckles on his wooden door. He sprang towards the door believing and hoping that it was Kurt. Wait Kurt has his own keys, why would he knock? Shit.

Blaine opened the door to come face to face with Sebastian. Sebastian wore a wide smile.

"Hey there, honey, can I come in?" Sebastian trilled

Blaine step to block the doorway knowing that there were words that needed to be exchange.

"Sebastian." Blaine muttered skipping the fluff and getting right to the point. "We hurt Kurt, more than you even know, and no, I can't blame it all on you, I betrayed him as well and I hate myself for it but I can't look at you without feeling so much disgust and filth and guilt." Tears threatened to fall but he breathed in and continued. "I can't have you around Sebastian, I am fighting to fix this mistake but you only remind me of it, I'm sorry." The entire time he kept his eyes downward avoiding the face of Sebastian. "Please leave and don't come back." He turned on his heel and reentered his home leaving Sebastian to stand paralyzed on the doorstep. He had actually wanted to scream at Sebastian but he realized blaming Sebastian wouldn't make him feel any better, he was to blame. Sebastian didn't betray his promises to Kurt, Blaine did.

"Hey Rachel, it's Blaine is Kurt staying with you?"

"Yes his is Blaine and what the hell did you do, I've never seen him like this?" Rachel sneered through the phone.

"Rach, I—I cheated on him….. with Sebastian."

Moments of hated filled silence over took the line before Rachel's screaming voice returned to it. "You bastard. What did Kurt do to deserve that? I never thought – you- of all people would hurt Kurt so much, I thought you loved him." She laughed wickedly sending shivers down Blaine's back. "With Sebastian, Blaine. Really? You are not stupid you know how insecure he is about you being with Sebastian he only sucked it up because he wanted you to be happy and he wanted you to know that he trusted you with everything he had."

Blaine snapped, more from being angry with himself more than with Rachel. "Damn it I know and everyone reminds me."

"Blaine, make this right." She sighed. "I don't how, but make this right." With that the line went dead and Blaine was back to square one collapsing into tears.

He was going to fix this.

Kurt returned from a long day of work where his attempt at being happy crumpled every time his mind flashed to Blaine. He missed him he really missed him. His honey eyes and curly dark brown hair and his masculine scent but he also was repulsed by him. He walked up the steps and slowly paraded to the door 10E before looking down to a dozen roses wrapped and laid on the doormat with a CD in a sleeve that said play me. Kurt knew it was from Blaine and half of him wanted to run inside and play the CD right away while the other half wanted to leave it there for it to be stepped and trotted on. But his hate subsided just enough to allow him to reach out for Blaine's apology and scoop up the flowers and the CD and walk into his friend's apartment. Still reaching out for Blaine's apology he retreated to his computer and put the CD in to listen to.

Blaine's voice came to life through the computer and it made Kurt's face light up.

"There is nothing I can say to express by apologies, I can't take back what I did but I love you, only you. I don't know how to tell you how I feel, so I am going to express it in the most honest way I can."

Musical chords graced the speakers and Blaine's voice sang out.

_And I remember everything,  
Everything I loved,  
I gave it away like it wasnt enough  
All the words I said and all you forgive  
How could I hurt you again?_

What if I let you in?  
What if I make it right it?  
What if I give it up?  
What if I want to try?  
What if you take a chance?  
What if I learn to love?  
What if, what if we start again?

All this time  
I can make it right  
With one more try  
Can we start again?  
In my eyes,  
You can see it now,  
Can we start again, can we start again?

Emptiness inside me, wonder if you see  
Its my mistake and its hurting me  
I known where we've been  
How did we get so far?  
What if, what if we start again?

All this time  
I can make it right  
With one more try  
Can we start again?  
In my eyes,  
You can see it now,  
Can we start again, can we start again?

I'm lost inside the pain I feel without you,  
I cant stop holding on, I need you with me!  
I'm caught inside the pain  
Can we never love again?  
I'm lost without you!

One more try,  
Can we start again?  
In my eyes, can you forgive me now?  
(Can we start again?)  
Can we start again (one more try?)  
Can we start again?  
Can we start again (can you forgive me?)  
Can we start again?

"I will do anything to win you back. I will fight for you for the rest of life or die trying will you please at least come over tomorrow after work so we can- talk? Please?" Blaine's voice broke in desperation and the CD cut off.

Kurt hatred had covered him again and this time he sang his own song, with silent tears streaming down his face.

_Say you're sorry  
That face of an angel  
Comes out just when you need it to  
As I paced back and forth all this time  
Cause I honestly believed in you  
Holding on  
The days drag on  
Stupid girl,  
I should have known, I should have known_

I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairy tale,  
I'm not the one you'll sweep off her feet,  
Lead her up the stairwell  
This ain't Hollywood, this is a small town,  
I was a dreamer before you went and let me down,  
Now it's too late for you and your white horse to come around

Baby I was naive,  
Got lost in your eyes  
And never really had a chance  
My mistake, I didn't know to be in love  
You had to fight to have the upper hand  
I had so many dreams  
About you and me  
Happy endings  
Now I know

I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairy tale,  
I'm not the one you'll sweep off her feet,  
Lead her up the stairwell  
This ain't Hollywood, this is a small town,  
I was a dreamer before you went and let me down,  
Now it's too late for you and your white horse to come around

And there you are on your knees,  
Begging for forgiveness, begging for me  
Just like I always wanted but I'm so sorry

Cause I'm not your princess, this ain't a fairytale,  
I'm gonna find someone someday who might actually treat me well  
This is a big world, that was a small town  
There in my rear view mirror disappearing now  
And it's too late for you and your white horse  
Now it's too late for you and your white horse to catch me now

Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa  
Try and catch me now  
Oh, it's too late  
To catch me now

And at the end of the song Kurt honestly didn't know if he could face Blaine the next day, but underneath all the craziness in his mind, his heart was yearning for Blaine and sooner or later it would find its way back.

"_**Start Again-Red"**_

"_**White Horse- Taylor Swift"**_

_**Sorry for the music add in's but after all it is a glee fanfic woot.**_

_**High-five for protective Rachel and Blaine ending things kind of nicely with Sebastian**_

_**And now commence Blaine getting Kurt back, will we see them together in the chapter :O **_

_**Let's find out **_

_**REVIEW PWETTTY PWEASE**_


	7. Gershwin

_**Chapter 7**_

_**Blaine & Kurt ((((((((: **_

_**Let's see them talk**_

Work was a day full of anxiety. Kurt couldn't help thinking about going to see Blaine later. His heart was overjoyed but his mind never failed to remind him what a bad idea this was and how much Blaine had hurt him. Officials from Vogue stopped by the wrack his brain with transfer details and scheduled appointments; only sending his body into deeper anxiety. By the time the end of the day rolled around Kurt was relieved to slump against the shower wall in Rachel's bathroom. He had an half an hour before he was meeting Blaine at the house and he was terrified but he was also excited, he wanted to see Blaine, so badly it hurt. He picked out a killer outfit and meticulously styled his hair. He hailed a cab and read the address to the driver, breathing in deeply trying to calm his racing heart.

Kurt slid the key into the lock feeling safe in the familiar sound, and calm in the feeling, but his heart still raced with fear. He cracked open the door and stepped in, not knowing what to expect.

The floor was lined with roses petals and the living room was lit romantically with dozen of candles. His heart almost burst in happiness, till his mind flashed back to the moment he saw Blaine and Sebastian kiss on that exact couch, and soon his heart was in his feet, bringing tears of harsh memories to his eyes. Blaine was leaning against the kitchen counter with his dark hair slicked back wearing tight black skinny jeans and a fitted teal V-neck. He looked stunning and well put together which surprised Kurt.

"Hi, Kurt, I'm glad you decided to come." Blaine said as he glided across the kitchen to collect champagne glasses. He poured the liquid into the two cups and made his way back to Kurt. He extended his arm with the champagne in it to Kurt, who hesitantly scooped up the drink.

"I came here to talk." Kurt said flatly, bringing his walls up and protecting his feelings. He had set his glass on the counter behind him.

"Kurt- I messed up so bad, I can't even try to explain it away. You said you hate me and then I—I just fell apart. I broke my promises and I destroyed our trust. I can't say sorry enough but I want to show you how sorry I am." Blaine stepped closer to Kurt only leaving one foot between their bodies. "Can we start over? Can I work to earn back your trust? To show you how sorry I am and to show you that you are the only one I love. Please Kurt, I will do anything." He ended his sentence abruptly and reached for Kurt's hand. Kurt's body didn't respond but instead stood frozen, however, the battle raging inside was violently loud. His heart said stay but his mind said go.

Blaine sensed his internal conflict and leaned in to break the tension. His lips met Kurt's pushing gently against them. Kurt didn't respond but didn't break away either.

"Kurt, kiss me back." He trilled quietly as he broke apart for air. He leaned back in to kiss his husband but he felt something wet against his cheek and he knew Kurt was crying and he also knew why.

Because all Kurt could imagine while kissing Blaine was Blaine and Sebastian.

Blaine had destroyed this intimate connection and he couldn't reverse his mistake.

"Blaine, I-" He choked out. "I can't."

"Please don't give up on us. Please fight for us."

"I did but you didn't." He snapped back

"Then letting me do the fighting, just please let me." Blaine cooed with a tone of defeat.

Kurt's mind gave in and his heart pushed forward. "Fine, but don't think that things will go back to normal." Kurt warned. "I also need some time to think, I need this weekend to myself, I promise I'll call on Monday, and I never go back on my promises." Kurt said intentional bringing up Blaine's mistake. With that he swiftly left the house and jumped into his car.

He drove and drove and drove, not knowing where he was headed until he pulled up in front of Gershwin Theater. Tears hit his eyes as he remembered that this was where their first date had been as a married couple. His mind dove back into all the past happiness.

"_That was fantastic." Kurt squealed, gripping his husband's hand harder. _

"_I know, baby, and being next to you felt even more perfect." Blaine said in reply his heart warm with love._

"_Kurt, you are the love of my life." Blaine leaned into to Kurt's ear and began to hum against it. _

_He pulled back and widened his mouth to sing._

"_I've heard it said that people come into our lives for a reason, bringing something we must learn and we are led to those who help us most to grow if we let them and we help them return, we I don't know if I believe that's turn but I know I'm who I am today because I knew you." Blaine sang at Kurt, ending the line with a scorching kiss that made Kurt's heart melt._

_Blaine interlocked his hands with Kurt and pulled him to leave so they could go home and make love as husbands._

Tears were flowing down his cheeks as he remembered all the happiness. Was that one mistake worth throwing away all their love? Kurt was torn in half and so confused.

He returned to Rachel's apartment with a decision made, but this decision would prove to be harder to carry out that he thought because forgiveness is a long journey with a lot of pain.

_**Do we like?**_

_**Big thanks to my sister who helped me with some ideas. And yay for writing this in the car on a road trip.**_

_**Kurt and Blaine are kind of on track**_

_**Reviews and ideas? Yessss duhh winning**_

_**Please please please tell me what you think AGHHHHH **_

_**Love you all xoxoxxoxoxox**_


	8. So close, but yet so far

_**Burt/Rachel/Klaine oh yes, read on lovelies. **_

Kurt's weekend passed excruciatingly slow, as thoughts of Blaine passed through his mind. This mistake, this affair, was so much more than he could take; it sent a cloud of doubt on the rest of the good experiences. There were brief moments of work related issues, with his big transfer to Vogue right around the corner. The last thing he needed right now was to have marriage issues, he needed to be focusing on work especially after just receiving this amazing job, but he couldn't and he won't until he learns to how to forgive.

Blaine's weekend wasn't much too different. He was overjoyed that Kurt was going to give him a chance, but what could he say or do to make what he did okay. As the weekend passed he became increasingly upset with himself, and began doubting if he could ever make this right.

As the sun rose on Monday, Kurt picked up his phone and dialed Blaine.

"Kurt, you called." Blaine said, as if he was surprised.

"Yes, I promised I would and I did." He said completely monotone.

"So can I take you on a date tonight?" Blaine asked hopefully. Kurt sighed and left a moment of silence lingering between them.

"I don't know I have a lot of work tonight and I have to work out some details for the next issue of Vogue." Kurt replied still trying to push Blaine away.

"Please, just give me a chance; I'll pick you up at 7." Blaine said quickly before ended the call. Kurt placed his phone in his trench coat pocket before storming out of the apartment to work.

As the clock neared 4 his phone rang out. Kurt thought it to be Blaine but was surprised when Burt's voice answered.

"Hey, Bud."

"Hey, Dad."

"How are things at Vogue?" Burt questioned.

"Actually very good, we just got the last issue out and I'm working on the next one." Kurt said proudly.

"Yea, I saw the last one, it was great Kurt, I am so proud of you."

"You bought Vogue?" Kurt chuckled.

"Yes I did." Burt said matter-of-factly. "Because I am incredibly proud of my son and all his accomplishments."

Kurt's eyes watered and he cracked a huge grin. "Thanks dad." He said through a watery smile.

"I love you Kurt, keep your head up." With that the call ended and Kurt returned to his work with renewed happiness and a permanent smile.

He reached Rachel's apartment at the tick of 5 and prepared for his date tonight. He felt like a teenager again, trying to dress to impress, to show Blaine that he was fine without him. They had been apart for 3 weeks and it was taking its toll. He missed being held by Blaine and coming home to find his husband. He missed sharing his life with the person he loved. Blaine didn't even know about Vogue yet. Kurt sighed in defeat and continued to get ready. On time as always there was a knock at the door at 7 sharp. He opened the door to find Blaine dressed breathtakingly and he felt all his blood rush south. Sexy thoughts of Blaine flooded into his mind and he felt as though he needed a cold shower then and there.

"Hello, you look gorgeous." Blaine assured.

"Don't look too bad yourself." Kurt stated.

"Shall we go?" Blaine inquired.

"We shall."

Kurt did not have clue to where they were going, he was just trying to give Blaine a chance, and to give his heart a break.

They pulled into the parking lot where the sign _One if by land two if by Sea _illuminated the street. Blaine scurried to the Kurt's door opening it for him. Kurt stepped out of the vehicle and his jaw dropped when he saw the restaurant. It had been the first date they had had when they moved to New York City. Blaine intertwined their fingers and pulled them towards the front door. The hostess asked what the reservation was under and Blaine responded with Hummel-Anderson. Reminding Kurt that they were married and this just wasn't a flash back.

The hostess led them back to a romantic secluded part of the restaurant away from peering eyes.

"Blaine, this, is amazing."

"You deserve it. And tonight is all about you. I will try to be as honest as I possibly can be. Ask and I'll answer." Blaine said humbly.

The first part of the date was spent reminiscing about the younger parts of their marriage and relationship, remembering back to a time when things were simpler and it was easier to be in love.

In a moment of silence Blaine locked eyes with Kurt swimming into them filling them with love.

"I love you." He whispered before leaning in to kiss his husband. The kiss spoke the unspoken words and apologies and for that moment in time everything was okay.

Kurt's heart overflowed with love and happiness but he had to know.

"Tell when it happened." Kurt demanded.

Blaine took a deep breath in and calmed himself before proceeding. "It was the day after we had the big fight about Sebastian and me getting back at 11." Blaine's heart drown in guilt as he flashed back. "You had said you hated me and to be honest I just couldn't shake those words. I was so hurt and vulnerable so at the next dinner date, Sebastian asked me what was wrong and I just said that you hated me, and then he sweet talked me and then he just went for it. He kissed me." He sniffled on the verge of tears. "And I kissed back and from there it went into a full blown affair. I would feel so guilty and then we would fight again and I would go right back to him. I'm sorry."

"Why didn't you talk to me, I thought things were normal, we would make up and proceed as usual. I'm your husband why did you lie and say everything was fine?" Kurt questioned really hurt and confused.

"I don't know. I just felt so helpless and like I couldn't talk to you." Blaine said trying to be completely honest.

"Did you talk to him about how you felt? Did you tell him how we fought and then we had make up sex 3 days later where you told me how in love you were with me? That you didn't love anyone like you loved me? Was that all a lie?" Kurt accused. "I guess Sebastian was right I will never be good enough for you and you will always choose him over me."

"No, Kurt I don't love anyone else, just you. I was childish and wrong and selfish. Please, Kurt."

Silence

"I have to go." Kurt said hastily. He rushed out the restaurant tears pouring out of his eyes. He was happy that Blaine was honest, but why did the truth have to hurt so damn much.

He hailed a cab and slid into the seat, reading Rachel's address off the cab driver.

"Hey, Kurt how was your hot date."

"It was okay; we got some stuff out into the open. We haven't been that honest with each other in a while. It was nice, but it ended in some tears."

"Sounds like you want him back." She smirked at him.

"I do. But it still hurts and I'm afraid he'll do it again."

"I know he hurt you and I won't lie and say that forgiving him will be easy. You have every right to think that he will hurt you again but he is trying to so hard to prove that he won't and remember if you live your life in constant fear of what might be, instead of what is, then you won't actually be living." Rachel replied before strolling off to her bedroom.

_**A bit more angst. Don't kill me, I promise they will be together. Pinky swear.**_

_**Yay for Rachel! Those are some wise words.**_

_**Ideas for next chap. And how Blaine will win Kurt back, I'm thinking that I might have Sebastian swoop back in to apologize to Kurt, to give him a bit of closure and possible marriage counseling. What do you think?**_

_**I might have some angry!Blaine because that is always sexy.**_

_**I don't own Glee, Vogue, or One if by Land Two if by Sea which is a restaurant in NYC. **_

_**I know the story is moving by slowly but I want it to be realistic. **_

_**Please review**_

_**xoxoxxo**_


	9. Can I give you up?

_**Sebastian's back.**_

_**Woot.**_

_**Enjoy XOXXOX**_

Work for Blaine hadn't been an easy feat. He had requested to be moved to a different trial team than Sebastian. The boss hadn't questioned him much knowing that things were weird between them, and they were the two best lawyers and he didn't want to throw them out. However, next week was the big trial and they had been on the same team for that and today that had a conference with the 2 other lawyers working on the case. This was the biggest case the firm had, and then needed to buckle down and win. Even if they didn't like each other they needed to learn to work together.

The entire conference, Blaine's eyes locked on the floor only coming up to meet the gaze of the other 2 lawyers or to glance at the paperwork. The conference went surprisingly well and they were very prepared for the trial, it was a sure win, the one good thing that came out of the conference.

As he the other lawyers slipped out, Blaine started to pack his papers into his brief case silently. He carded his hand through his dark curls and sighed deeply. He was exhausted.

"Hey, Blaine" A familiar voice rang into his ears.

"Hello, Sebastian" Blaine regarded his presence but did little more to acknowledge his existence.

"Blaine I think we need to talk."

"No Sebastian, we don't, you are getting on my last nerve now please leave." Sebastian wasn't being that particularly annoying but Blaine realized just how angry he was with himself and Sebastian for what they had done. His anger was just flowing over and he couldn't control it.

"Blaine, yes we do."

"No. Don't make me say it again. Leave." Blaine demanded.

"I won't leave until we talk."

Blaine snapped. He turned to face Sebastian and crashed his fist against Sebastian cheek, sending him stumbling backward, immediately bringing a black and blue bruise to his face. Sebastian faced contorted, as pain overtook his eyes.

"I said, no." Blaine swiftly left the conference room, running to his car. He bounded into the car and slammed the door shut behind him. He beat his fists on the steering wheel and broke down into sobs.

He hadn't even forgiven himself yet, so how did he expect Kurt to?

Sebastian was persistent and wasn't about to give up. So he drove behind Blaine following him to his house. Blaine however is oblivious and didn't notice the red truck following him. As he pulled into the driveway and scurried inside he didn't even notice the car park on the curb and the tall lanky man stalk towards the door. He opened the door furiously and stood brutishly in the doorway.

"You don't get to sucker punch me and walk away."

"Sebastian, what the hell, get out."

"No Blaine, you are going to listen to me."

"I will not."

Sebastian jumped towards him and slammed into the wall placing one hand on either side of his shoulders.

"Listen. I didn't ask."

Kurt pulled into his own driveway wondering who the red truck belonged to. He saw that the door was flung open and began to worry. He stepped into the house and cowered at the scene. Sebastian face was inches away from Blaine and Blaine wasn't fighting him. Kurt stood frozen. He wanted his legs to move but they wouldn't. It reminded him of the night he walked in on them kissing. Despair rose inside him, sending tears down his cheeks. Blaine's gaze finally caught his, and the whole scene came to life.

"Kurt." Blaine yelped pushing Sebastian off him. "It's not what it looks like, I promise." Blaine reached out to grab Kurt's arm, but as soon as he made contact, Kurt's body came to life and ran out and to his car. He drove away quickly cutting the radio on.

_What..._

_Could you hope to achieve,_

_When I'm cryin' and you know why?_

_How..._

_Do you find your reasons,_

_In my deepest, darkest night?_

_I keep givin' you up._

_I remember when,_

_You were my only friend._

_Now I'm not sure you can,_

_Feel like that again._

_I keep givin' you up._

_And my,_

_You know my mind's made up,_

_this time._

_There's no goin' back to find_

_What we had._

_And I know,_

_There's no light left to shine._

_There's no wrong,_

_but there's no right._

_So enough._

_I'm givin' you up._

_All the things that you said,_

_Well you seem to forget._

_They surround in my head,_

_Every night._

_And there's a battle within,_

_That I'll never win._

_'Cause it's me,_

_That I'm up against._

_'Cause it's my heart,_

_Versus common sense._

_Can I give you up?_

_And my,_

_You know my mind's made up,_

_this time._

_There's no goin' back to find,_

_What we had._

_And I know,_

_There's no light left to shine._

_There's no wrong,_

_but there's no right._

_So enough._

_I'm givin' you up._

_Strip the layers,_

_Make me better,_

_Help me get out clean,_

_Show your colors._

_I'm slipping under._

_Help me through this,_

_pleaseee!_

_And my,_

_You know my mind's made up,_

_this time._

_There's no goin' back to find,_

_What we had._

_And I know,_

_There's no light left to shine._

_There's no wrong,_

_but there's no right._

_So enough._

_I'm givin' you up._

_Yeahhhhh!_

_My mind's made up!_

_Yeahhhhhh_

_I'm giving you up,_

_I'm giving you up,_

_I'm giving you up._

Kurt really felt like he wanted to give Blaine up it was too much heartache, but could he? Could he give up the love of his life?

"What the hell Sebastian, what the fuck did you do?"

"I'm sorry I really just wanted to talk, I didn't think he would take it like that."

"Seeing us within kissing distance wasn't supposed to spark horrible memories for him? Asshole."

"Shit, that wasn't my point, I actually wanted to apologize."

"Really? Well you fucked that up." Blaine whipped out his phone and sent a text to Kurt.

_Please meet me at Central Park at 9. I promise I can explain. –B_

Kurt promised he would give Blaine a chance, and this was no different, he would give Blaine a chance to explain what seem like the unforgivable. As he strolled into Central Park at 8:55 the lights of the city were the only thing left to illuminate the park. He spotted Blaine on a tablecloth with a picnic basket, with an iPod radio lying next to him. As he closed the distance between them, he heard a soft melody overtake the atmosphere.

_We'll do it all  
Everything  
On our own_

We don't need  
Anything  
Or anyone

If I lay here  
If I just lay here  
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

I don't quite know  
How to say  
How I feel

Those three words  
Are said too much  
They're not enough

If I lay here  
If I just lay here  
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

Forget what we're told  
Before we get too old  
Show me a garden that's bursting into life

Let's waste time  
Chasing cars  
Around our heads

I need your grace  
To remind me  
To find my own

If I lay here  
If I just lay here  
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

Forget what we're told  
Before we get too old  
Show me a garden that's bursting into life

All that I am  
All that I ever was  
Is here in your perfect eyes, they're all I can see

I don't know where  
Confused about how as well  
Just know that these things will never change for us at all

If I lay here  
If I just lay here  
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

Blaine's eyes were now locked on Kurt's to show that he meant every word that the song had just sung. Kurt's eye rimmed with tears before he remember why he was there.

Blaine accosted him, taking Kurt's hand in his, and bringing it to his side.

"I love you. So much, Sebastian wasn't there for the reason you think. Why don't I let him tell you?"

There was a tap on Kurt's shoulder and turn to face the taller man and his heart collapsed, this was the man that Blaine had cheated on him with, what did he have that Kurt didn't?

"Kurt, nothing can tell you how sorry I am. I was so wrong. I destroyed yet another thing, and you should hate me. I know I don't deserve your forgiveness, but I want you to know that today I was only there to apologize but Blaine was so angry he wouldn't listen so, I pinned him down. I know I shouldn't have, but I just wanted him to listen."

Kurt ignored the sentiment. "Why does your face look like shit?"

"Well earlier, at work, I tried to talk to Blaine and he just got angry and punched me, not that I don't deserve it." Sebastian sighed, working so hard to show Kurt that he was sorry, which he really was. When Kurt had yelled at him he had realized he hated who he was.

"I won't lie and say that I forgive you because honestly I don't, but I want to apologize for the way I yelled at you, I was out of line." Kurt admitted. "Also I appreciate you trying to wrong the right, but it's too painful to see you here, so can you please leave."

Sebastian obliged and turned on his heel and walked away slowly.

"Why did you do that?" Blaine accused. "He was trying to apologize."

"Sorry, that seeing him makes me want to die." Kurt said and then laughed.

Blaine's anger overtook him. It was angry with himself mostly, with Sebastian and with Kurt. Why couldn't he forgive him? "Why the hell can't you forgive me Kurt, I am trying so damn hard. No one else means anything to me." Blaine released Kurt's hand and carded his fingers through his curly hair.

"Because I'm not ready and that is a damn good reason and also I can't forgive you until you forgive yourself. I was looking forward to our dinner but I can see you need some time to yourself, call me when you have calmed down." Kurt turned around and hailed a cab, he felt quite calm because seeing Blaine's anger meant that this meant something to him, that it was hurting him too and that… that felt good. This meant something to Blaine and now they were one step closer.

_**Yay? Nay?**_

_**I promise this was actually good, even though Blaine snapped, Kurt is happy with that. One step closer, lovelies.**_

_**Any ideas? **_

"_**Giving you up- Miley Cyrus"**_

"_**Chasing Cars- Snow Patrol"**_

_**I will also take song request, and character requests for who you want to see in the chapters.**_


	10. Before the Worst

_**Sorry! For the wait, my computer is being crappy, like really really really crappy, my dad was arrested(long story) and 4**__**th**__** of july was yesterday and my family is cray cray . **_

_**SOOOOOOO….. **_

_**Enjoy xoxoxox**_

Thanksgiving was around the corner and it was tradition for Kurt and Blaine to fly back to Ohio to see Kurt's family. They never really visited Blaine's parents because they weren't exactly accepting of Blaine's lifestyle. In fact they hated Kurt and that deterred the couple from visiting them. This year though they would be going to see Kurt's parents, Blaine just didn't know it yet.

Blaine's day had been shit, he couldn't figure out why Kurt had sounded so calm last night. Blaine was basically yelling at him and Kurt just replied to superiority and sincerity. He was confused and hurt that maybe Kurt had just stopped caring. Blaine's torturous thoughts were interrupted by the ringing of his phone.

"Hello." Blaine's voice bellowed over the phone.

"Hiya Blaine, so has you know it's near Thanksgiving and my parents are expecting us." Kurt said.

"Wait, I can still come?" Blaine replied being completely surprised.

"Yes." Kurt said with a tone of finality not wanting that conversation to go any further. "The plane leaves at 3am, so I will be sleeping there tonight because there is no sense in wasting time and gas, and our place is closer to the airport."

Blaine's voice caught in his throat as Kurt said "Our place". He hadn't said that since this had all started.

"O—okay." That was all Blaine could manage to choke out.

Kurt stepped into his house around 10 o clock after spending the afternoon with Mercedes, who had flown in for a recording but had spent lunch with him.

"_Cedes." Kurt yelled from across the coffee shop._

"_Hey, white boy, you look good." Mercedes said closing the distance between them._

"_How has L.A. been, any man candy?"_

"_Actually you won't believe it but Sam's out there and we have been dating for a while." Mercedes gossiped. "Speaking of man candy, how's yours?"_

_Kurt sighed which elicited a concern look from Mercedes and knowing that he couldn't lie to her he got right into it. "Long story short, he cheated on me, with Sebastian…. Yea I know, don't even get me started, and right now we are trying to work things out." Kurt explained. "Look Cedes I know you want to kick ass and half the time so do I, but he is trying, so hard, harder than he ever tried during our marriage, unfortunately I think what happened made him appreciate what he had. He is still wrong of course, and I am still incredibly pissed off, but I love him… How am I supposed to walk away from someone I love?" Kurt rushed through his speech to get done with everything he needed to say before Mercedes would threaten to kill Blaine._

"_Kurt, you already know that I want to kick his ass, but I know you love him, I just hope that you don't let him abuse your forgiveness." Mercedes added._

"_I know Cedes, I know." Kurt pleaded._

When Kurt stepped into the house finding Blaine perched on the couch with Mulan playing on the screen in front of him. Kurt slide up behind Blaine and tapped his shoulder. Blaine surprised by the presence jumped inches off the couch.

"Well, hello Blaine." Kurt murmured through the laughing.

"Asshole." Blaine replied snidely.

"Hey I was just tapping your shoulder. You are the one that acted like I hit you with a crowbar." Kurt said childishly.

Blaine pouted and folded his arms across his chest and made puppy dog eyes at his husband, advancing towards him hypnotizing Kurt with his eyes.

His husband. This was the most normal they had been in a while and it made his heart flip.

"Don't even try that Blaine."

"Fine. You hungry? I've got Chinese."

"Chinese! I will gain like 5 pounds, I need to look good." Kurt said moving his hands to rest on his hips, in a sensual way.

"You look incredible to me." Blaine cooed, adding a touch of flirt. But really Kurt did look good it took everything Blaine had for him not to jump on Kurt and caress his body.

Kurt snapped back sharply, slamming out of the fantasy land that they were in. It had been so easy to be so comfortable with the man he loved, as if all were good in the world, but things weren't.

"No thanks, I already ate; I'm going to take a shower." Kurt turned to hurry to the shower, his demeanor set back to being tense.

"Alright, baby." Obviously Blaine's wasn't the same

Kurt slowed his pace, confused by the term of endearment, but proceeded none-the-less.

Blaine looked after him with admiration and sighed in content. Blaine headed to bed and went to sleep dreaming about Kurt.

Kurt finished his shower and took his place in the guest bedroom. It was late and he was exhausted so sleep overtook his body.

His dreams soon turned to nightmares. And his sleep became fitful. He had tossed so much that he had managed to hurl himself off the bed and to the floor. Overtook by fear and pain ricocheting through his body he stumbled to his room. His "room". He saw a figure lying on the left side of the bed facing the right and subconsciously crawled onto the bed and nuzzled himself against the other man. He felt warm, safe and protected as the man's hands slide around him pulling him closer in the embrace. After all they had been through they had never forgotten how to be husbands.

_It's been a while since the two of us talked  
About a week since the day that you walked  
Knowing things would never be the same  
With your empty heart and mine full of pain_

So explain to me how it came to this  
Take it back to the night we kissed  
It was Dublin city on a Friday night  
With vodkas and coke, I was getting insomniac

We were sitting with our backs against the world  
Saying things that we thought but never heard  
Oh, who would've thought it would end up like this

But everything we talked about is gone  
And the only chance we have of moving on  
Was trying to take it back before it all went wrong

Before the worst, before we met  
Before our hearts decided it's time to love again  
Before too late, before too long  
Let's try and take it back before it all went wrong

There was a time that we'd stay up all night  
Best friends, yeah talking 'til the daylight  
Took the joys alongside the pain  
With not much to lose but so much to gain

Are you hearing me? 'Cause I don't wanna miss  
That you would drift on memory bliss  
It was Grafton street on a rainy night  
I was down on one knee and you were mine for life

We were thinking we would never be apart  
With your name tattooed across my heart  
Oh, who would've thought it would end up like this

But everything we talked about is gone  
And the only chance we have of moving on  
Was trying to take it back before it all went wrong

Before the worst, before we met  
Before our hearts decided it's time to love again  
Before too late, before too long  
Let's try and take it back before it all went wrong

If the clouds don't clear  
Then we'll rise above it, we'll rise above it  
Heavens gate is so near, come walk with me through  
Just like we used to, just like we used to, yeah, yeah

Let's take it back before it all went wrong

Before the worst, before we met  
Before our hearts decide it's time to love again  
Before too late, before too long  
Let's try to take it back before it all went wrong  
Let's try and take it back before it all went wrong

As Kurt rose out of bed as his alarm clocked rang at 1:30am, his head went into a panic as he saw his surroundings sending thoughts of doubt into his head, but his heart just warmed with love and assurance. He missed that, but shouldn't have done it and he was beating himself up for it.

As he watched Blaine as he still slept, thoughts stirred across his mind.

"Let's try to take it back before it all went wrong." Kurt sang softly, tears rimming his eyes.

_**Yay for referencing the Klaine Dublin kiss skit. If you haven't scene it then you must.**_

_**Yay for Mercedes, she is my second favorite character on Glee so I WIN! And woot for her and Sam dating, I just couldn't resist, sowwy.**_

_**Thumbs up for family next chapter.**_

_**We are going to see some Finn and Blaine's parents might make an appearance.**_

"_**Before the Worst- The Script"**_

_**This chapter was a lot of fun to write, so tell me what you think, once again sorry for the wait.**_


	11. Torn

_**Enjoy xoxoxo**_

"Blaine, wake up we have to be at the airport in 30 minutes. The clock read 2:25. The airport wouldn't be too busy and the flight didn't leave till 3:30.

"Five more minutes, baby."

Frustrated with Blaine's laziness and by his incoherent use of endearments he stormed to the bathroom, taking to fixing his hair which was a hot mess. He styled it up and sprayed in the product, impressed with himself for how it looked in such short time. He waded out of the bathroom and face-palmed as he saw Blaine's snoring figure on the bed.

"Get your ass out of bed, Blaine Anderson."

Blaine sluggishly got ready, which meant throwing on a pair of sweats and a blue fitted t-shirt that outlined his delicate muscles. His hair was free from his gel cage and it was thrown around wildly. When Blaine reached the living room Kurt was leaning against the counter with a semi-annoyed face.

"Let's go babe." Blaine said startling Kurt. Blaine still thought from the way things had gone last night that they had become normal again.

"Don't call me that." Kurt demanded walking through the door.

Opps, he had spoken too soon.

"You can't avoid having this conversation," Blaine pleaded with Kurt. He was confused and the lines just seemed so blurred.

"Fine, you want this conversation. Yesterday I was like that because it was so easy to be in love with the man I fell in love with, but then I realized things have changed. It took no effort to be comfortable around the man I remember you were, but you aren't, even if you pretend you are. And last night I needed you, I longed for you and I still do. I love you" Kurt admitted.

"But right now love, just doesn't seem strong enough, because when I woke up next to you, I wanted to hurl and it broke my heart to know that I am not ready to love you, even though I do." Kurt added. Honestly his words didn't even make sense to him. He knew what he was trying to say but his thoughts twisted as he struggled with emotions.

"So do you love me?" Blaine asked still dumbfounded by what Kurt had said.

"I don't know any more Blaine." Kurt said letting out a sob. He thought he did, he felt like he did, but it hurt too much to think about.

"Kurt, no don't say that, please, I love you, please.. just please .. please." Blaine couldn't form any sentences but he needed to, he needed to comfort Kurt. This was his fault and he owed it to Kurt to be the man he was supposed to be.

He took a deep breath in and spoke. "Kurt no matter what, I love you. I always have. No one else, I know you are trying so hard to forgive me and I know you want to. As long as you'll let me, I will keep fighting for us. I know…. I know I screwed everything up. I know I broke promises and vows and I can never take that back. But I will never give up. Until the day I stop loving you, I will try to fix what has been broken." Blaine assured Kurt, "So that means forever." Blaine had finally forgiven himself, no, he hadn't forgotten, but he forgave, because he had to, because he needed to, but was that enough?

_Because you bandage the damaged_

_But never really fix a heart._

"Blaine." Kurt stopped as if he couldn't speak any more. "Would you ever say that to Sebastian?" Kurt knew it was a stupid question, but he just needed to hear Blaine say "no". Even if it was a lie, he needed to hear.

"No. I would never say that to anyone but you." Blaine stopped considering saying more but he decided that a lot had been said already and nothing more needed to be added. Besides tears now openly flowed down both their cheeks, for different reasons, but crying none-the-less.

Kurt for the first time was sad that he may not be able to forgive Blaine, because he loved his husband and he wanted to. Before he had cried about being hurt and angry and confused but now he cried because he wanted to love Blaine so badly but his heart was torn in half and he was so close to giving up.

Blaine cried because for the first time in a long time he meant everything he had said to Kurt and it hurt so much that it still might not make a difference.

_Well, it's good to hear your voice_

_I hope you're doing fine_

_And if you ever wondered_

_I'm lonely here tonight__  
__I'm lost here in this moment_

_And time keeps slipping by_

_And if I could have just one wish__I'd have you by my side__  
__Oh, oh, I miss you__Oh, oh, I need you__  
__And I love you more than I did before_

_And if today I don't see your face_

_Nothing's changed, no one can take your place_

_It gets harder every day__  
__Say you love me more than you did before_

_And I'm sorry it's this way_

_But I'm coming home, I'll be coming home_

_And if you ask me, I will stay, I will stay__  
__Well, I tried to live without you_

_The tears fall from my eyes_

_I'm alone and I feel empty__God, I'm torn apart inside__  
__I look up at the stars_

_Hoping you're doing the same_

_And somehow I feel closer_

_And I can hear you say__  
__Oh, oh, I miss you__Oh, oh, I need you__  
__I love you more than I did before_

_And if today I don't see your face_

_Nothing's changed, no one can take your place_

_It gets harder every day__  
__Say you love me more than you did before_

_And I'm sorry it's this way_

_But I'm coming home, _

_I'll be coming home_

_And if you ask me, I will stay, I will stay, always stay__  
__I never wanna lose you_

_And if I had to, I would choose you_

_So always stay, please, always stay_

_You're the one that I hold on to_

_'Cause my heart would stop without you__  
__I love you more than I did before_

_And if today I don't see your face_

_Nothing's changed, no one can take your place_

_It gets harder every day__  
__Say you love me more than you did before_

_And I'm sorry that it's this way_

_But I'm coming home,_

_I'll be coming home_

_And if you ask me, I will stay, I will stay, I'll always stay__  
__And I love you more than I did before_

_And I'm sorry that it's this way_

_But I'm coming home, _

_I'll be coming home_

_And if you ask, I will stay, I will stay, I will stay_

The drive and wait in the airport passed in silence. Both minds travelling a thousand miles a minute made both men extremely exhausted and when they got into the first class seats they collapsed in exhaustion and emotional turmoil. Kurt was the first to doze off. As he slid off into unconsciousness he leaned towards his husband and murmured three words at him.

"I love you."

And he meant it because he was no longer battling his mind, it was just his heart and his heart was telling the truth. But soon his mind would wake up.

Blaine gasped, surprised by the confession, but relieved to know that they might make it. Because love overcomes all… right?

"He what!" Finn screamed in reply to Kurt's admittance of Blaine's affair. "I'm going to kick his ass. I swear to God. That pig." Finn ran to the door and slammed it shut. Kurt stood baffled but also extremely touched by Finn's display of anger because it meant he really cared, but it also meant Blaine might be in some serious trouble.

"Are you fucking kidding me, Blaine?" Finn augured approaching Blaine who was outside by the grill. "You cheated on Kurt. With Sebastian. You prick." Finn slammed his fist into Blaine's jaw, causing the younger man to fall to the ground. "He may forgive you, and you can thank your lucky stars that he is 10000000x the man you will ever be, but I. Never. Will."

Blaine stayed on the ground partly out of shock and partly out of pain. Not only had he destroyed things with Kurt, but he had ruined things with Kurt's family as well and that crushed Blaine because they were the closest thing to family that he had ever had.

_**Awesome Finn! And sorry for more angst. I promise we are getting to sweet Klaine kisses and cuddling. FLUFF! AGHHHHH  
**_

_**Burt and Carol in the next chapter as well as some more Finn. **_

_**I actually really enjoyed writing this chapter.**_

_**Please review or private message me with anything you want to see. **_

_**Also CONSTRUCTIVE criticism is greatly appreciated.**_

_**I should have the next chapter up tomorrow.**_


	12. Family

_**And the family time continues.**_

_**Enjoy. oxoxoxoxox**_

"Blaine, I'm sorry he found out," Kurt admitted to Blaine after Finn swept out of the backyard.

"Kurt, it's okay, I deserved that, and I don't expect you to lie for me. I just don't want to lose my family."

Kurt didn't respond. He didn't know what to say because he wasn't quite sure what the rest of his family would do.

* * *

"Dad." Finn said forcibly, accosting his father who was preparing dinner in the kitchen. "There is something you should know.."

"Blaine cheated on me." Kurt finished. "Finn I can tell him myself, I don't need you to do it." Kurt said a little angry.

Finn looked to Kurt with apologetic eyes and Kurt looked to Burt, who stood completely emotionless. An endless moment passed and Burt flew to the back door, prying it open so hard that it nearly flew off its hinges.

Blaine heard the door open and looked up to find the cause. But his head dropped in fear and guilt.

Burt stood furious at the door. He opened his mouth to speak but then snapped his it shut.

"Mr. Hummel I'm-I'm so sorry." Blaine said trying not to meet his gaze, knowing that he couldn't handle the disappointment in his eyes.

"He trusted you. He loved you." Burt yelled. "The person he loved the most, hurt him. How could you? And you have the nerve to show back up at my house, to walk into my house like you deserve my son, like you have done nothing wrong. I never thought you'd become such a bully, Blaine." Burt retreated into the house and stormed into his room, closing the door behind him.

Blaine tears finally unlocked and flowed from his eyes. It hurt to know that he had disappointed Burt. Burt thought he was bully and that tore Blaine apart inside.

* * *

Carol heard the sobs coming from Blaine's body and her motherly instinct took control.

"Blaine."

Blaine lifted his eyes to face her.

"Blaine. He is just upset and shocked and hurt. He loves you."

Blaine didn't answer.

"I can't say I'm too thrilled with you at the moment either, but I know that Kurt was always so happy when you two were together, even in high school. With you he actually lives. Kurt loves you and I know you love him. I'm sad to see all the men I love so hurt. We will all be stronger because of this." Carol decided to lay off criticizing Blaine because being yelled at by Burt was enough. At this moment Carol had her hand on his shoulder and she was crouched next to him rubbing patterns in his back. Carol rose to a standing position and turned to walk inside she stopped and whispered something to the air, which was barely audible.

"Without love, life isn't worth anything and everybody deserves a second chance."

She didn't know if she really believed that Blaine deserved a second chance but she knew he needed to hear that.

And she was right. He did need to hear that.

* * *

"Burt, I know what he did was.. horrible, but he is like a son to you. Blaine and Kurt need us. You know they belong together. They are going to struggle enough to fix this relationship. But Blaine is dying inside knowing he disappointed you." Carol confronted her husband about his tirade.

"Carol, I know, but Kurt is my son I am just trying to protect him."

"Kurt is 28, an adult, with adult problems; you can't protect him from everything. Right now he probably just needs his dad."

Blaine still hadn't moved from the ground, since Finn had punched him. Blaine's mind was swirling and nothing made any sense. His emotions were all combined but separate at the same time. He honestly felt paralyzed.

Kurt was walking towards Blaine but he went unnoticed. It actually hurt Kurt to see Blaine so broken. Kurt kept reminding himself that he was supposed to be angry at Blaine, but he just couldn't bring himself to.

"Blaine." Blaine turned and looked to Kurt. He furrowed his brows and let out a sob.

Kurt just stood there not sure what to do. Desperately want to help the wounded man.

"Kurt, will you hold me?" Blaine asked.

Kurt positioned himself next to his husband on the grass and laid them both down. He pulled Blaine into him and wrapped his arms around him caressing his body and feeling the familiar warmth between them. Blaine's body shook with cries.

Kurt knew he shouldn't be holding Blaine, but not only did Blaine need that Kurt needed it to.

* * *

Kurt let Blaine cry for a bit, but he knew they had to be inside for dinner in a bit.

"Blaine, let's head inside."

Blaine moved out of Kurt's embrace and rolled to face him.

"Thank you, I know I didn't deserve that or you, but …" Blaine couldn't even finish his sentence.

"Hey none of that, I think you deserved that." Kurt replied with a slight smile, bringing his hands up to cup Blaine's cheeks.

"What the hell?" Kurt thought to himself. "What am I saying?"

Kurt shook it off with a deep breath in and led Blaine inside their hands intertwined and they took their seats at the table and that's when all the things that should have been in his mind earlier hit him. He saw Sebastian cuddling with Blaine and he saw them hold hands and loving each other.

His body went rigid, and his breaths became raspy. Sweat plummeted off his face to the table. His fists clenched and his stomach twisted. The room blurred and his heart raced.

"May I be excused?" Kurt asked quickly before running off to his room.

* * *

There was a knock on his door, before Burt entered the room.

Burt knew that Kurt didn't want to talk. So he seated himself next to Kurt and took his son into his arms and Kurt sobbed. Burt's eyes lined with tears and his heart hurt so much for his son.

It seemed like they were back to square one: forgiveness so far off that it seemed impossible.

* * *

Blaine went to the spare bedroom and jumped into bed. He turned out the lights and thought of how he had felt in Kurt's arms. He snuggled against a pillow thinking of how they fit together like a puzzle piece and how he had fallen more in love with Kurt tonight.

_The best thing 'bout tonight's that we're not fighting  
Could it be that we have been this way before?  
I know you don't think that I am trying  
I know you're wearing thin down to the core_

But hold your breath  
Because tonight will be the night  
That I will fall for you over again  
Don't make me change my mind

Or I won't live to see another day  
I swear it's true  
Because a guy like you is impossible to find  
You're impossible to find

This is not what I intended  
I always swore to you I'd never fall apart  
You always thought that I was stronger  
I may have failed, but I have loved you from the start

Oh, but hold your breath  
Because tonight will be the night  
That I will fall for you over again  
Don't make me change my mind

Or I won't live to see another day  
I swear it's true  
Because a guy like you is impossible to find  
It's impossible

So breathe in so deep  
Breathe me in, I'm yours to keep  
And hold on to your words 'cause talk is cheap  
And remember me tonight when you're asleep

Because tonight will be the night  
That I will fall for you over again  
Don't make me change my mind

Or I won't live to see another day  
I swear it's true  
Because a guy like you is impossible to find

Tonight will be the night  
That I will fall for you over again  
Don't make me change my mind

Or I won't live to see another day  
I swear it's true  
Because a guy like you is impossible to find  
You're impossible to find

**_"Fall for You- Secondhand Serenade"_**

**_Sensitive!Kurt YAY!_**

**_What do we think?_**

**_I feel bad for Kurt and I know his mood keeps switching on and off but I feel like that is how he would be. In love with Blaine but so hurt by what he did._**

**_I loved writing in Carol, I always see her as such a sweet figure. _**

**_Sorry it took so long, I had a Glee season 1 marathon today._**

**_Klaine cuddles yay! _**

**_AMG everyone is sad now. _**

**_Tomorrow is a new day though._**

**_Ideas and request: Make sure to let me know. _**

**_And thanks to all of you for all your support._**


	13. I'm Trying

_**Enjoy xoxoxox**_

Blaine rolled over in his bed trying to run from the sun's rays that were sneaking in through the window. As his mind slowly woke up from his peaceful sleep, he remembered all that had happened last night.

"Shit." He murmured to himself, remembering how hurt Burt had been and all the things he had said and as if my fate, there was a knock on the door followed by the subject of his thoughts.

"Mr. Hummel." Blaine said sitting up in bed and running his hand through his hair.

"Blaine, I'm trying to understand why you did this. And I can't, but I know you love Kurt, I can see the way you look at him. Please just make this right."

"You are like a son to me Blaine, since the day you approached me in the shop, I have seen so much in you. I wish you had seen more in yourself. I wish that you hadn't thrown yourself around. And I really wish I could fix this… I know marriage is... complicated and things get hard, but please… fight for it." Burt finished.

Blaine rose from his spot on the bed and made his way over to Burt, who he wrapped his arms around.

"I promise, I will fight for it or die trying. Kurt is worth it and I'm sorry I made him doubt that."

* * *

The holidays had passed in a flash. Most of the time they spent together as a full family was spent talking about the olden days and the other times were spent talking about current things in their lives while Finn gave Blaine the stank-eye the entire time. The conversation about Kurt's transfer to Vogue came up and Kurt ranted on and on about his new job and all his excitement poured out. But he had forgotten that Blaine didn't know.

* * *

"Why didn't you tell me about Vogue?" Blaine questioned taking his seat next to his husband on the plane.

"Well, we were fighting and I just didn't think it would be a great time to tell you."

"Why?"

"I don't know I thought you wouldn't care." Kurt said, actually not even sure of his reason.

"How could you think that? Of course I would share, I'm just hurt that you would keep this from me, we never keep secrets." Blaine trailed off.

"Well some of us keep a lot of secrets." Kurt answered back defensively.

Blaine snapped his mouth shut up knowing that he was clearly in the wrong. The rest of the plane ride was spent in silence.

* * *

The next morning Kurt rose from his bed in Rachel's spare room and made his way to the shower and prepared for an appointment he had at 9. He showered, got dressed, and styled his hair. He hailed and cab and gave him the address to a counseling center in downtown.

As he paid the cab driver he turned to see the intimidating building looming over him. He knew that he needed to talk about all this. It was keeping him up at night, distracting him at work, but most of all his heart ached and his missed his husband but he wasn't sure how to fix this.

As he was ushered into the room by his counselor he took in her appearance: short, brown hair, brown eyes, and pretty. He was thankful that he had a girl counselor, because he had always bonded more with women.

As he took a seat on the patterned brown leather couch she took a seat across from in a stylish white cloth seat.

"Hello, my name is Dr. Shoemake." She greeted him, extending an arm across the coffee table for Kurt to shake.

"I'm Kurt; it's nice to meet you." He countered, accepting her handshake.

"I want you to know that in this room, you have complete confidentiality and that there is no judgment…" She continued on her normal lecture about how he could trust her and what not. To be honest he hated the idea of spilling his heart out to someone but he needed an un-biased uninvolved party and he couldn't find that anywhere.

"I will spare you the questioning and just tell you why I am here. My husband cheated on me, with a man who has been a source of conflict before in our marriage and who never ceases to tell me how my husband deserves better than me." Kurt spewed out. He was trying to get in all out there.

"Kurt, I am so sorry to hear this."

"May I ask how you found out?"

"I walked in on them kissing and from there I just confronted him about it."

The doctor was scribbling notes down on her little yellow pad before she looked up to gaze at Kurt.

"What has happened since you found out?"

"Well I am staying with a friend of mine and he is staying in the house. We have had a few "moments" to say the least and he has tried to apologize and make things right but nothing seems to be working. The man he cheated on me with has even tried apologizing." Kurt sighed realizing just how hard Blaine had been trying.

"I know this question will sound cliché but how do you feel?" The doctor asked smiling. At the beginning of the appointment she had told him she didn't want this to feel robotic.

"To be honest, I'm really hurt and angry, why would he cheat? I have been a great husband, or at least I think I have. I know we have our share of fights, but we always got through everything to together. I guess what hurts the most though is that even while he was having an affair he would come home and tell me that he loves me and that we would be together forever. How could he lie to me? How could he lie straight to my face?" Kurt demanded his voice rising in decibel. Kurt breathed out.

"It's okay to feel all those things Kurt but what do you want to come of this counseling?"

"I want to forgive him, I do I just don't know how and seems like the only time I can be normal around him is when I push those thoughts out of my head and I don't want to have to do that. I don't want to have to pretend that I'm okay."

"Kurt first of all I want you to know, that it is okay that you can't forgive him yet, he broke the trust that you had. Second of all I want to ask you a question, and I want you to answer it in the most honest way possible. Do you want to save your marriage?" She asked completely serious.

"Yes, I do." He spit out quickly. "I mean I love him, he just made a mistake."

"Are you trying to convince me of that or are you trying to convince yourself of that?"

A few minutes passed in silence as Kurt tried to figure out what her words meant and why they sank so deep into him.

"Kurt, do you know why the affair started? Have you asked him why?"

"I mean he has kind of told me, but not really, he said we were arguing and he felt like he couldn't talk to me and that he was just being childish and running away."

Dr. Shoemake scribbled more things down on her pad.

She opened her mouth to speak but Kurt cut her off.

"I mean part of me feels like it is my fault, like I pushed him away and into the affair. Is it my fault?" That was the question that had been plaguing Kurt's mind for weeks that he refused to confront because he truly feared the answer.

Kurt had diverted his gaze downwards until the doctor's voice brought his eyes up again.

"Maybe that is what you need to talk to your husband about. I do want you to remember this though Kurt in no way does anybody ever deserve to be cheated on, don't think that you deserve that no matter what."

"Thanks doctor." Kurt replied absently.

"I would love to see you next week, and if you would like I also do couples counseling." She said handing him her card and walking out of the room giving him time to think.

As he walked into the hallway he caught of glimpse of a short dark haired man walking into a room.

It was Blaine.

_**So now they are both in counseling,**_

_**The counseling may not be accurate but ohh well.**_

_**REVIEW PWETTTTY PWEASSEEEEE**_


	14. The unexpected

_**Okay I am going to rant a bit so if you don't want to read it, then just skip down to the story. **_

_**I have been re-watching like all the seasons and all the episodes and last night I just got so flustered when I realized that Darren kind of like TOOK OVER. Don't get me wrong he is insanely talented and deserves to be on the show, but I kind of miss seeing other people perform, it is now like Darren, Lea, and Amber. He isn't even an original and I just wish that other people got more stuff like Jenna and Kevin and even Naya. And also for the second part of my rant, Kurt and Blaine's relationship is so unrealistic and I just don't like it. I MEAN I LOVE KLAINE AMG! But it was just disappointing.**_

_**Okay my rant is over**_

_**Enjoy xoxoxox**_

Kurt froze; he didn't know whether to confront Blaine or to shake it off. But that decision was made when Blaine noticed Kurt's figure out the corner of his eye. He turned his head to confirm the suspicion and deemed it was true. Blaine's eyes held a note of confusion and shame, before he bowed his head and scurried into the room. Kurt stood just a second longer and then he turn and ran out the counseling center.

Thoughts passed through his mind continuously on his way back to Rachel's apartment.

_How long as he been going to therapy?_

_Why didn't he tell me?_

Kurt brought his hands up to grip the sides of his face, sighing into it.

Thank god today was Saturday and he didn't have to worry about work because honestly his mind was going a-wall and it kind of felt like it would never stop.

His mind was past of the point of pacification and it made it nearly unbearable.

As he walked into the apartment he noticed Rachel was gone (probably off to Wicked Rehearsal). As soon as he got to his "room" or so he now considered it to be, he slipped off his shoes and jumped into bed, without even bothering to take off his immaculate outfit and prevent it from wrinkling.

Surprisingly he drifted off into a very deep sleep, which gave his mind the peace it so desperately needed.

* * *

When Kurt finally woke out of his lazy afternoon nap his eyes locked on the clock that 4:10pm.

_Holy crap! I just wasted the entire day, way to go Kurt._

While Kurt scolded himself for letting the day pass him by the heard the muffled sound of the door opening and closing.

"Hey, Rach." Kurt greeted through the walls separating the rooms.

"Hey Kurt, didn't think you would be here." Rachel said as her footsteps came closer.

"Let's just say I needed some serious beauty sleep." As Kurt said this he stood, and walked his way to the full length mirror across the room and cowered at the sight.

_Yikes I am a hot mess._

"So much for beauty sleep." She chuckled as she now stood in the open doorway of his room. "Hey I was thinking you and I could hit the town tonight, I think you need some have some fun, you stress lines are showing," she added light-heartedly.

"Some friend you are? Do you remember your sweater phase?" Kurt mocked back, quirking an eyebrow at her.

She put her hands up in a show of defeat, but showed a wide grin on her face. "Your right, your right, my fashion sense was a little … off back then."

"A little?"

"ANYWAY… So I was thinking tonight you… me… hot date" She confirmed jokingly. She really meant well and she just wanted to get his mind of things. She knew he was ecstatic about all the things happening with Vogue but he just seemed to have a black cloud trailing after him.

"Fine, I guess I can't mope inside forever…. Or I can try." Kurt said pondering over the ridiculous idea but when he met Rachel's bitch stare he reconsidered. "Alright, we leave at 8, but first I have to run to the house..." He paused not really knowing what to call it. "I got to get my suit for tomorrow night's business dinner."

"Well don't mind me, I'm catching coffee across the street later so I'll be in and out, but don't ditch me tonight. Rachel Berry doesn't like to be stood up." She said as seriously as possible trying not to let the humor show through.

"Oh, someone's got a hot date. SPILL NOW!" Kurt demanded.

"Okay well he works the lights for the WICKED show, Yea I know not the best job, but anyway, he is totally gorgeous and he is actually very sweet and funny."

"Finally you are getting some damn man candy. You are telling me all the details tonight."

This was exactly what Kurt needed right now. A friend who wasn't trying to fix everything or tell him how to do anything, just someone who wanted to go out and have some fun, thank heavens for Rachel.

* * *

_Earlier that day:_

As Blaine's appointment came to an end his therapists, Dr. Martin, looked at up from his notes and locked eyes with him and said:

"Blaine, you need to tell him why, you will not get anywhere without telling him why."

The doctor left the room giving Blaine some time to think.

_But I don't want to hurt Kurt's feelings and I don't want him to think he deserved it._

Blaine was at a crossroads, he wanted things to get better, but he didn't want to make them worse by blaming Kurt, yes there were reasons Blaine strayed but that didn't give him an excuse, did it?

Blaine continued the rest of his days finishing the tedious chores he needed to do. And as the clock hit 6 and he realized the frig was empty he left to go grocery shopping

* * *

_Meanwhile_

Kurt pulled up at the house only minutes after Blaine had left. As soon as he entered the house he made a B-line for the coat closet where he left his dinner suit hanging. After briskly sweeping up the suit and running it out to the car, he came back and gallivanted around the house, taking in old photos and memories from the house.

"Remembering the old times," A voice cut through shaking him out of his reminiscing. Kurt felt a hand slide into his and he relaxed into the comforting show of affection.

"Yea… Sorry didn't hear you come in," Kurt apologized.

"Kurt- I."

"Me first," Kurt cut Blaine off and proceeded pulling his hand away and turning to face Blaine. "Why? Just why? Please be honest with me… you owe me at least that." Kurt stood tall and brought his shoulders back, trying not to break under the tension floating between them.

"Well, we had been fighting a lot; you never seemed to want to listen. No matter what I did I was wrong, it felt like you just kept pushing me away." Blaine could feel his own anger rising and the urge to play the blame game was over-whelming. "You never wanted to talk out the issue you just ignored it and thought it would work out, not everything always works out like in those silly books you write." Blaine dared to say. But he realized he might have been wrong when he saw Kurt's face. It was indescribable, his features ridden with darkness.

"Okay." Was all Kurt said but his face said many other things. Those books were things he had started in high school when he was trying to escape from the world. He was incredibly proud of them and it hurt that Blaine would say something like that. He knew that he had his faults and that he should have tried harder to work out the issues, but Blaine was just being cruel. "And just so you know Blaine, those silly books, helped pay for you to go to law school." With that he turned around and left, not storming out but walking calmly. He knew Blaine had valid points but he didn't have to say it like that.

As soon as the door closed behind Kurt, Blaine fell onto the couch, with a huge knot in his stomach and bile rising up in his throat. "Shit."

* * *

"Rachel you ready? Let's go I need some alcohol."

They had decided to just head to a local bar, have some fun, talk, and listen to music dance, just something to keep the sadness at bay.

"Yea I'm ready, let's roll."

They pulled up to the bar in the taxi that they both agreed was better so that both of them could drink.

They took a seat at the bar and ordered two drinks from the bartender. Rachel excused herself to use the bathroom and Kurt just sat getting lost in the music and the alcohol.

"Kurt! O my God, is that you, you look stunning and as always your fashionista self."

Kurt spun around to see indeed it was who he thought it was and if was to be honest, he didn't mind it. "Chandler, it's so good to see you."

_**I want to write the next chapter so badly**_

_**Sorry about the wait by Computer crashed yesterday**_

_**I love Rachel**_

_**Tell me what you think**_


	15. Memories

_**Another rant… How did Kurt not get into to NYADA, amazing audition, national championship with the Cheerios where he was on LEAD VOCALS and a national championship in glee. And how did Rachel get in, in what world do you stalk the talent scout and harass and harass and harass until you get her to let you in? NO WORLD. AGHHHH. Kurt was so good and she even said he was amazing and then he just gets rejected. Kurt never gets anything, besides Blaine and even that I'm not sure about for next season.**_

_**I am officially sad.**_

_**Anyway**_

_**Enjoy xoxoxxo**_

"Kurt, you look amazing! That outfit is pureeeeee genius. I'm glad to see that you haven't lost your sense of fashion." Chandler complimented.

Kurt's cheeks blushed furiously at the compliment. Compliments were actually foreign to him. Blaine had tried after that one discord in Kurt's senior year, but it really just wasn't his thing. Kurt had come to except that and loved Blaine in spite of it but it felt really nice to be complimented on something that he was passionate about: his fashion.

"Pftt, I'm Kurt, I will never lose my sense of fashion." He said chuckling.

Chandler caught the shine of Kurt's ring as the club lights rebounded off of it.

"Ahhh, who is the unspeakably lucky man?" Chandler asked a tone of jealously obvious under his voice.

"Blaine." Kurt stated, trying to not let his voice crack.

"Ohh, you sound stressed marital problems?" Chandler questioned sincerely with a comforting smile playing across his lips.

Kurt just signed in response, waiting a brief moment before starting to reveal his problems. It was easy for Chandler and Kurt to talk because for those of you who don't know they used to date. It was about 2 months after Blaine broke up with Kurt because he thought the distance would be too much. They were actually a great couple and Kurt was genuinely happy but he didn't love Chandler and you can't control your heart. But they had managed to stay friends for a while after their break up but then life led them down separate paths.

* * *

"_Baby, hurry up or we are going to miss our dinner reservation." Chandler cooed outside the bathroom door._

_Moments later Kurt emerged from the bathroom with red puffy eyes._

"_Kurt?"_

"_Chandler, I think we need to break up. I like you I do but-.."_

"_But you love Blaine." Chandler whispered putting his head down in defeat knowing that this had been coming._

"_I'm so sorry, I thought I could move on from him I really did…"_

"_Save it. I could never compete with Blaine for your affection, and I can't make you love me." Chandler turned and headed toward the door stopping only to change the song that was playing off the iPod dock. After he clicked to a new song he turned to Kurt and said "But I love you." With that he nearly ran out and Kurt was left alone in his room while the song took over atmosphere. _

_Turn down the lights, turn down the bed_  
_Turn down these voices inside my head_  
_Lay down with me, tell me no lies_  
_Just hold me close, don't patronize - don't patronize me_

_Cause I can't make you love me if you don't_  
_You can't make your heart feel something it won't_  
_Here in the dark, in these final hours_  
_I will lay down my heart and I'll feel the power_  
_But you won't, no you won't_  
_'Cause I can't make you love me, if you don't_

_I'll close my eyes, then I won't see_  
_The love you don't feel when you're holding me_  
_Morning will come and I'll do what's right_  
_Just give me till then to give up this fight_  
_And I will give up this fight_

_Cause I can't make you love me if you don't_  
_You can't make your heart feel something it won't_  
_Here in the dark, in these lonely hours_  
_I will lay down my heart and I'll feel the power_  
_But you won't, no you won't_  
_'Cause I can't make you love me, if you don't_

* * *

As Chandler went to open his mouth to reply to Kurt, Kurt stood up.

"I'll be right back, I need to use the restroom."

Chandler smirked as Kurt scurried away and he headed to the stage whispering something to the DJ.

Kurt made his way back to where the pair had been sitting only to realize Chandler wasn't there. He turned to the stage to see Chandler's figure center stage with the microphone.

The club went quiet and Chandler's voice cut through.

"This song is for a special man in the club today… I know that another has hurt you but I would never do that… I love you and you deserve so much better….. This is for you."

Chandler's sweet and soft voice over took the room as he began the first verse.

Kurt froze in place, eyes wide and heart racing. _Shit_!

_The day I first met you_

_You told me you'd never fall in love_

_But now that I get you__I know fear is what it really was_

_Now here we are, so close_

_Yet so far, haven't I passed the test?_

_When will you realize_

_Baby, I'm not like the rest_

_Don't wanna break your heart_

_I wanna give your heart a break_

_I know you're scared it's wrong_

_Like you might make a mistake_

_There's just one life to live_

_And there's no time to wait, to waste_

_So let me give your heart a break_

_Give your heart a break_

_Let me give your heart a break_

_Your heart a break__Oh, yeah yeah_

_On Sunday, you went home alone_

_There were tears in your eyes_

_I called your cell phone, my love__But you did not reply_

_The world is ours, if you want it_

_We can take it, if you just take my hand_

_There's no turning back now_

_Baby, try to understand_

_Don't wanna break your heart_

_Wanna give your heart a break_

_I know you're scared it's wrong_

_Like you might make a mistake_

_There's just one life to live_

_And there's no time to wait, to waste_

_So let me give your heart a break_

_Give your heart a break_

_Let me give your heart a break_

_Your heart a break_

_There's just so much you can take_

_Give your heart a break_

_Let me give your heart a break_

_Your heart a break__Oh, yeah yeah_

_When your lips are on my lips_

_And our hearts beat as one_

_But you slip right out of my fingertips_

_Every time you run, whoa_

_Don't wanna break your heart_

_Wanna give your heart a break_

_I know you're scared it's wrong_

_Like you might make a mistake_

_There's just one life to live_

_And there's no time to wait, to waste_

_So let me give your heart a break_

_Cuz you've been hurt before__I can see it in your eyes_

_You try to smile it away_

_Some things, you can't disguise_

_Don't wanna break your heart_

_Baby, I can ease the ache, the ache_

_So, let me give your heart a break_

_Give your heart a break_

_Let me give your heart a break_

_Your heart a break_

_There's just so much you can take_

_Give your heart a break_

_Let me give your heart a break_

_Your heart a break_

_Oh yeah,yeah_

_The day I first met you_

_You told me you'd never fall in love_

Chandler's eyes stayed locked with Kurt's the entire time. As Chandler stepped down towards to Kurt, Kurt remained frozen.

"Kurt, I still love you. Ten years later and I can't get you out of my mind. Just give me-."

"Chandler, no I can't. I'm married and I love … Blaine." Kurt stammered out his mouth parched like the Sahara.

"You deserve so much better Kurt." Chandler reached out to caress his hand but Kurt flinched away. Chandler sighed in respite and turned and exited the club, leaving a still stunned Kurt to ponder over the course of action that had just occurred.

* * *

Rachel had been watching from a corner in the club figuring she shouldn't intrude on their get together, but seeing a shocked Kurt she made her way over to him.

"Kurt are you okay?" Rachel asked, seeing that Kurt looked like he had seen a ghost.

Kurt shook slightly trying to clear his mind.

"No, but I will be."…. At least he hoped, Chandler had rattled his mind with memories of the past and the idea that someone else thought he was worth loving.

As Kurt changed to get ready for bed his phone rang alerting him to a new text:

_I shouldn't have done that Kurt, I am sorry but even if you can't love me I just want you to be happy and it kills me to know that Blaine hurt you.- C_

_It's okay Chandler, I just have a lot on my mind, but I would really love if we could be friends.- K_

_I would love that- C_

_**Okay just because I know a lot of people are worried. Kurt is not going to cheat.**_

_**More Blaine/Kurt next chapter**_

_**Review please**_


	16. Trust

_**Rant time- so I just got to the "Goodbye: episode, last chapter's rant was about the "choke" episode, anyway I can't fathom 1. Why Kurt and Rachel and Finn only applied to one college, Kurt could have applied for NYU….like chandler… just saying. No one just applies to one school. was the bullshit with Klaine in the last episode… their last words were "So we are going to be okay." "I told you l'm never saying goodbye to you…" …. Waiting for the kiss… still waiting… still waiting….**_

_**RAGE! I feel like Kurt loses yet again. If he is stuck in lima for another year I will dip my TV in water. **_

_**And I am incredibly mad at FOX because Ryan had been writing in lots of Klaine and Brittana kisses, hugs, handholds, but fox censored them out. DAMN YOU! I mean I would rather watch Darren/Chris make out then watch Lea/Cory do it one more time. Call me crazy.**_

_**Ohh and just so everyone knows my favorites of the cast are Kevin, Amber and of course Chris. I love everyone but those are my favorites. **_

_**And I still think that Klaine might break up next season…. Which would result in me dipping my TV in water yet again. **_

_**Whoa I'm out of virtual breath**_

_**Enjoy xoxoxo**_

Kurt woke up to a slight headache from the remnants of last night's alcohol. He checked the clock seeing that it was only 8 on a Sunday morning. Why was he up so early? Kurt found the source of his wake-up call when he checked the phone and saw a message from Blaine.

_Why were you with Chandler last night?- B_

Kurt smacked his forehead with his hand. Now was not the time for an incredibly sexy but jealous Blaine. Instead of flattering him like it usual did, it just brought annoyance.

Kurt debated between telling him that nothing had happened or making him sweat. He decided on the latter.

_That is honestly none of your business.-K_

Kurt ignored the message that followed his response, instead heading to the shower. The hot water felt miraculous on his aching muscles. The shower allowed him peace and quiet but as he showered ended a sudden thought popped in his mind. _Wait, how does Blaine know I'm with Chandler? _Kurt was infuriated; Blaine cheated not him so why was Blaine keeping an eye on him?

His phone rang and he huffed and rolled his eyes before wrapping a towel around his midsection and answering knowing exactly who it was.

"Yes?"

"Why were you with Chandler?"

"How do you know I was with him?"

Blaine ignored the interrogation and continued to grill him for details on his night with Chandler.

"Did you do something?" Blaine asked his voice cracking slightly.

"I was with Rachel." Kurt answered purposely not answering his question.

"That's not what I saw." Blaine said, trailing off at the end knowing that he had just given Kurt what he had wanted to know.

"Blaine, I will only ask you once, don't keep tabs on me. Remember you cheated not me, I keep my promises." The connection dropped and Kurt dropped back into bed exhausted.

_Hey Chandler want to grab some coffee tomorrow?- K_

_Absolutely yes!- C_

* * *

A very guilt-ridden Blaine rang Rachel's house phone hoping Kurt would answer but his hopes were only crushed by the sound of the answering machine.

"Hey Kurt, umm, it's Blaine, would you mind coming over tonight, so we can, umm talk. Please? Okay well I hope I'll see you then. I love you, bye." Blaine ended the message.

* * *

Kurt of course had heard the message and he rolled his eyes at the sweetness in Blaine's voice. Things that used to make him melt, now just repulsed him. But he was one to keep his word and he told Blaine he would fight for their marriage and he would so he decided he would go over later tonight, but he had about 8 hours before that to mentally prepare and he needed all of that time because seeing Blaine was like putting all his emotions in a blender.

* * *

"Kurt, you came." Blaine greeted when he opened the door to a freezing Kurt.

"Can I come in?" Kurt asked as if this wasn't his house. It sure didn't feel like it.

"It's your house too, you know."

Kurt only grunted in response, slipping past Blaine into the house. Blaine stepped up behind Kurt slipping Kurt's jacket off and placing it on the coat rack.

Kurt sighed deeply peering into the memories of the house. He dropped his head and clenched his fists. Blaine noticed his husband's tension and decided to ease the stress.

"Kurt, first, I would like to apologize for my behavior this morning, I was out of line, and I know you would never do something like that. Second I would also like to talk to you about that last conversation we had. I was so wrong." Blaine took a deep breath trying to meet Kurt's gaze but it was so piercingly strong he couldn't. "I should have come to you. I should have tried to fix the marriage. But I just ran away and I have no excuses. I want to work harder to make the things that happen earlier in the marriage not happen again, but I can't do it alone. Kurt, I love you, more than life itself. I will do whatever it takes and however long it takes regain your trust."

At this point Blaine was crying and Kurt was on the verge. Kurt was truly touched by Blaine's speech but something was holding him back and he knew what. It was all words... words… words and more words and Blaine had broken so many of those before.

"You know, Blaine, Trust, is like a mirror, you can fix it when it breaks, but you will always see a crack in that person's reflection."

Blaine's heart dropped into his feet, his palms starting sweating and his thoughts became frazzled.

Kurt moved to face Blaine their faces separated my mere inches. Kurt pressed his lips to his husband's, shocking Blaine out of his paralyzed state. Blaine immediately kissed back, finding comfort in the feel of Kurt's lips. The lips matched rhythm and they were drunk off each other's taste.

"But as long as you are willing to get into the ring with me, I will fight for us and I'll always stand by you."

_Oh, why you look so sad?  
Tears are in your eyes  
Come on and come to me now  
Don't be ashamed to cry  
Let me see you through  
'Cause I've seen the dark side too_

When the night falls on you  
You don't know what to do  
Nothin' you confess, could make me love you less

I'll stand by you, I'll stand by you  
Won't let nobody hurt you  
I'll stand by you

So, if you're mad, get mad  
Don't hold it all inside  
Come on and talk to me now

Hey, what you got to hide?  
I get angry too  
Well I'm a lot like you

When you're standing at the crossroads  
And don't know which path to choose  
Let me come along  
'Cause even if you're wrong

I'll stand by you, I'll stand by you  
Won't let nobody hurt you  
I'll stand by you

Take me in, into your darkest hour  
And I'll never desert you  
I'll stand by you

And when, when the night falls on you, baby  
You're feelin' all alone  
You won't be on your own

I'll stand by you, I'll stand by you  
Won't let nobody hurt you  
I'll stand by you  
Take me in, into your darkest hour  
And I'll never desert you

I'll stand by you, I'll stand by you  
Won't let nobody hurt you  
I'll stand by you  
Yeah

Won't let nobody hurt you  
I'll stand by you  
I'll stand by you  
Won't let nobody hurt you

I'll stand by you  
No, no, no, no, no  
Take me in, into your darkest hour  
And I'll never desert you  
I'll stand by you  
I'll stand by you

After minutes of sheer bliss of the two men embracing each other, tears running down both of their faces, Blaine's baritone voice interrupted.

"Will you move back in?"

Kurt hadn't expected that and he didn't know what to say. He could always stay in the guest bedroom but he didn't know if he could live in that house. "I'll try." He said unsure of how things would turn out. "Only if you come to marriage counseling with me."

Blaine only nodded in response.

But they didn't know that having Kurt in that house would make everything so much worse.

"_**I'll Stand by You- Pretenders"**_

_**Kurt back in the house YES! And coffee tomorrow with Chandler **_

_**AND Christmas around the corner.**_


	17. Dreamer

_**2 Klaine kisses for all of season 3… let me cry. All in one episode.**_

_**Rant: This is about some of the CrissColfer fics I have been reading which I love but I hate that they always think that Chris fell for Darren the moment he walked in the door. I don't know I just think they portray Chris as weaker and am I major ChisColfer fan so you can understand my disappointment. Let's see Darren fall for CHRIS OMG YES! **_

_**Another Rant: The fight in 3x17 which I wrote my other fanfic about (which I will be updating eventually) O MY LORD worst fight ever…. If I was Kurt I would have packed my bags and left. Dropped his ass like a bag of hot potatoes considering he was a huge hypocrite. Also I wanted the fight to last longer but it was like Accuse, Humiliate, Fix the fight. And then NO KISS! WHY? WHY? WHY? WHY?**_

_**Anyway enjoy…**_

After Kurt had made many trips between Rachel's and his place he had finally managed to move all of the things he had accumulating in Rachel's back to his home. By the time he had finished the clocked chimed 10 and he was ready for a good long sleep. Of course, Blaine had offered to help, but Kurt needed some time to just think and cope. He was actually excited about moving back in but he couldn't control that voice in the back of his head that told him it was a bad idea. Kurt had also been avoiding the question that needed to be answered: Which room was he staying in? He knew Blaine would be considerate and accepting either way but he honestly wanted to sleep next to husband but he didn't know what would happen if he did.

Kurt's mind was on full overdrive and he hadn't even realized he had been standing in the front door hallway for a good ten minutes.

"Kurt, are you okay, you've been staring into space for a good while now," Blaine inquired and he walked briskly past him.

"What? No, Yea I'm fine." Kurt shook off his lethargy and went the kitchen. He pulled out a Diet Coke and leaned against the kitchen counter still contemplating his decision. Blaine was still standing on the other side of the kitchen sipping away at his beer reading what looked to be a trial brief.

"Did you ever have sex with Sebastian in our bed?" Kurt blurted out not knowing how to phrase in the ever so delicate "Kurt" way.

He placed the paper down gently on the counter and turned to face Kurt, who eyes were now clued to the floor. "No. Kurt. I-"He closed his mouth, not really knowing what else to say.

Kurt relaxed in relief; he didn't think he could handle the affirmation of that suspicion.

"Did you have sex in this house with him?"

"Yes."

Kurt felt bile rise up in his throat and anger grow in his heart, but he refrained from speaking out. Kurt of course had already known but that didn't mean it hurt any less when Blaine confirmed it.

"Thank you for being honest Blaine." Kurt lifted his gaze to see a look from Blaine he hadn't seen before. It showed such deep love but at the same time it was ridden with guilt and sorrow. Kurt wanted nothing more than to love that man until his eyes never showed that again but he couldn't.

"Let's go to bed." Kurt said abruptly before his mind had even had to filter it.

Blaine's eyes widened but he only nodded in agreement. Blaine turned and sauntered his way to the room Kurt magnetically pulled behind him. Kurt was still not sure of what he was doing but followed anyway. When the door opened to their room, the smell of Blaine invaded Kurt's nostrils, surrounding him in comfort. The room felt so foreign but yet so familiar, it made him dizzy to think about it. The room was cleaned up and the bed was made meticulously. The bedspread was soft shade of grey that contrasted the blue of the walls. Kurt's mind seemed to be swimming in the memories of decorating the room. A smile tugged at his lips and his blue eyes shined. He had nearly forgotten the presence next to him before he turned to inspect what Blaine was doing.

Blaine absently-minded changed into pajamas which consisted of a pair of sweats, while Kurt a little more reserved about this wore a t-shirt and sweats. He wasn't sure why but he felt insecure around Blaine, as if the bodies were a new concept to each other. Blaine crawled in on the left side as usual, burying himself underneath the grandiose comforter, and settling his head down on the feather-filled pillows. Blaine's hair was free from his gel-cage letting his curls run free, which delighted Kurt. Kurt followed, remaining on the right side as far away as possible feeling a palpable wall between Blaine and him. He turned to face the bathroom door, pulling the comforter to his chin. The room was dark and quiet except the adorable snores of Blaine.

Blaine had always been a person to fall asleep quickly and tonight was no different. Unfortunately Blaine was an affectionate sleeper as well which resulted in him gravitated to Kurt's side and draping his arms around his husband and pulling him into a tight embrace. Kurt was still awake, breathing unsteadily in the embrace of the shorter man. His chest was tight and he felt trapped. As he stilled his body and allowed his drowsiness to take over ,his mind began to fade out. He began to feel safe in the embrace and melted back further into the position, hearing Blaine's heartbeat which he knew almost as well as his own. He tuned into the rhythm of Blaine's breath which guided him into a peaceful dreamland, as warmth spread over him from being in the comfort of Blaine's arms.

* * *

Blaine's dreams were Kurt filled to say the least. They were back in the McKinley Choir room, Blaine standing in the middle and Kurt in a seat in front of him. Not another soul was in the room.

Suddenly chords overtook the air and Blaine's voice rang throughout the choir room.

_I'm not a perfect person_  
_There's many things I wish I didn't do_  
_But I continue learning_  
_I never meant to do those things to you_  
_And so I have to say before I go_  
_That I just want you to know_

_I've found a reason for me_  
_To change who I used to be_  
_A reason to start over new_  
_And the reason is you_

_I'm sorry that I hurt you_  
_It's something I must live with every day_  
_And all the pain I put you through_  
_I wish that I could take it all away_  
_And be the one who catches all your tears_  
_That's why I need you to hear_

_I've found a reason for me_  
_To change who I used to be_  
_A reason to start over new_  
_And the reason is you_

_And the reason is you_  
_And the reason is you_  
_And the reason is you_

_I'm not a perfect person_  
_I never meant to do those things to you_  
_And so I have to say before I go_  
_That I just want you to know_

_I've found a reason for me_  
_To change who I used to be_  
_A reason to start over new_  
_And the reason is you_

_I've found a reason to show_  
_A side of me you didn't know_  
_A reason for all that I do_  
_And the reason is you_

Tears had sprung from Blaine's eyes and he dropped his head down. He saw Kurt's boots as he approached and held his breath. Kurt gently grabbed his chin and brought his eyes up to match his blues.

"It's okay, I forgive you." He whispered a smile across his face.

Blaine had been waiting forever to hear that. His heart melted and a smile appeared.

Kurt leaned in and pressed his lips to Blaine's swiping his tongue against Blaine's bottom lips asking for permission. Blaine granted him access immediately and became lost in the sensation. The kiss became heated each man begging for the other. Blaine broke away for air moving his mouth next to Kurt's ear.

"I love you."

He quickly returned to this kiss, happiness nearly overflowing out of his body.

_**Okay, so I wanted to give you guys a break from all the angst and have some sweet cuddles. Yay! I don't want to torture you all and for everyone who has been be reading my rants and responding I LOVE YOU ALL! Let's be best friends.**_

_**Dreaming is FUN!**_

_** Nurse Kate: I promise I won't torture you all like Ryan did to us.:)**_

_**Okay I have question and I don't mean to offended anyone but  
**_

_**Am I the only girl on the planet that thinks Darren isn't like insanely sexy?**_

_**Yea I think his cute but I also think Grant and Kevin are cute.**_

_**Call me crazy.**_

_**"The Reason- The Hoobastank"  
**_


	18. Chandler

_**YAY for procrastinating like shit! Sorry it took me forever to upload. I actually really liked this one and I really like Chandler.**_

_**I know you love my rant's so here it goes: I think the reason Mercedes left New Directions was well-founded, while she may not have left politely, I can't say I wouldn't have done the same thing, so I was kind of disappointed that they made the girls out to be so horrible and then made them lose, and then forced back into the background. I actually like Amber's voice over Lea's.**_

_**The whole Tina thing where they pointed out how she was neglected, I thought was really cool, but she still didn't get anything out of it… like a thank you from Mike. /Facepalm**_

_**Also when the ND sang "Here's to Us" where the hell were Kurt/Blaine…. Not fair.**_

The next morning Blaine awoke from a peaceful and well deserved night of rest. The bed however, was cold which alerted him the escape of his husband. As his mind finally came to and became to process his surroundings he heard the angelic melodies of Kurt flowing from the bathroom door. A smile tugged at his lips as he heard the soft gentle countertenor sing blackbird in the shower. Kurt's voice nearly lulled him back to sleep but the foreclosing time frame until he had to work was enough to force him out of bed. He headed to the guest room to take a shower, not wanting to try to impose himself upon Kurt like he usually did.

His shower was spent in parallels with Kurt, humming teenage dream and listening to it echo around the barren bathroom. When he was finally done dressing and preparing for the day, the aura surrounding him was unmistakably the happiness he had been in weeks. The air around him was light and he no longer felt like his legs were held to the floor by chains. As he came into the view of the kitchen he noticed Kurt preparing coffee. Kurt's back was turned towards him and it gave him a moment to take in the form of his so foreign husband. His eyes trailed up his criminally long legs that caressed his perfectly shaped ass. Just as Blaine's thoughts began to hit the gutter and all the blood started its descent south, Kurt's laugh cut through.

"Enjoying the view, Anderson." Kurt chuckled, addressing him with a name he hadn't since high school.

His voice was light with relief and what seem like happiness. It didn't seem to contain the same note of despair.

"Don't flatter yourself, Hummel." Blaine replied mockingly, the same lightness in his voice. The banter between the two was fun and teasing, reminding them of their high school days.

As the two prepared their mugs of steaming coffee, Kurt gently slid his hand over Blaine's drawing patterns in on his olive skin. Blaine released his grip on the mug and turn to face Kurt taking Kurt's chin in his other hand, the former hand still linked with Kurt's on the table. Blaine dipped his head in for a simple, chaste kiss, barely a touch but it meant so much.

As the two headed for the door, Kurt's stopped momentarily to convey some news to Blaine, "I'm heading out for coffee after work, with Chandler, so I will be home a bit late.." Kurt sensed Blaine's hesitation and continued to assure him it meant nothing. "I will have my phone with me, just text me if you need me or want me… "he added flirtingly. "We also have counseling tonight at 7, so please be ready to leave on time."

* * *

For Kurt, last night had strengthened the fading faith that he had in his partner. He wasn't sure why: maybe it was the way he felt in Blaine's arms or maybe that he was ready to forgive and move on into a new chapter on their life but whatever it was it sent butterflies to his stomach. He really did want to close this chapter in their lives and starting writing a new one. Sure, he would probably never forget but that doesn't mean he has to live in it forever.

Everyone once in a while, happening significantly less than before, Sebastian would cross Kurt's mind, making his heart wince. It was still painful to know that Blaine had... shared himself with Sebastian the way he was only supposed to with Kurt, but Blaine's efforts over the weeks had shown Kurt that they had something Sebastian and Blaine would never have and that was love.

The day went by impossibly fast, spent in a haze of fashion for Kurt and in a heap of trial papers for Blaine. Blaine decided to hit the gym after work, knowing that Kurt would be home a little late. The gym allowed Blaine to get everything out that he was feeling and he needed that. And of course Kurt proceeded to his coffee 'date' with Chandler.

* * *

When Kurt entered the small, cozy coffee shop Chandler was already slouching at the counter, stealing glances at the handsome man preparing coffee for another guest. Kurt giggled a bit seeing how much of a lost puppy Chandler looked like right now. Kurt approached cautiously trying to give Chandler time to react but Chandler was still clueless. Eventually Kurt cleared his throat giving away his arrival to the pining young man.

Chandler shrugged off Kurt's subtle winks and eyebrow quirks, calling him a 'disillusioned fool'. However a smile remained permanently plastered to his porcelain skin. The ordered their coffee from the over exuberant young barista and chose a quiet table in the corner to enjoyed their coffees and idle chit-chat.

"You so like him, don't deny." Kurt demanded as soon as they had reached their little alcove in the corner.

"Pftt, I think his attractive, yes." Chandler tried to play cool, rolling his eyes in mock disgust.

"Mhmm, sure. You want him more than I want the new leather bag from Marc Jacobs." Kurt's voice rose in excitement hitting a new octave, but his use of fashion humor, flew over Chandler's head.

"Do not." Chandler argued childishly. "How would you even know?" Chandler questioned sticking his tongue out at the man sitting perpendicular to him.

"Because… because it was the way I looked at Blaine." He answered trailing off slightly at the end, remembering back to the day on the staircase.

"Oh, I'm sorry Kurt I didn't mean to hit a sour note," Chandler inquired noticing the deep thought of the older man.

"No, no, no you didn't, just thinking you know." Kurt responded his gaze diverted upwards. As he brought his gaze down to meet Chandler's again he spoke, "I just remembering looking at him as if nothing else existed and at the point, I just knew, knew that I loved him." He slumped his shoulders in resignation and proceeded to sip his mocha.

"How are things?" Chandler asked, daring to put a comforting hand on his friend's shoulder.

The spent the remainder of their time together discussing little bits of Kurt's marital problems but also concocting a plan to get the hot guy's digits.

Which they did.

Chandler said his thank you and farewell to Kurt before taking off on foot to his apartment.

Kurt hailed a cab and headed home. As the cab glided past the lights of the city, a smile never left Kurt's face. He had really enjoyed spending time with Chandler, he seemed like a great guy and he needed a great guy as well.

* * *

Kurt and Blaine entered the tan walls of the therapist's room, which seemed to hold an ambiguous feeling. They seated themselves on the dark leather of the loveseat and Kurt took to crossing his legs while Blaine leaned forward resting his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands. The room had a cool flow of air and the lack of decorations unnerved Kurt.

Blaine, however, seemed stressed and Kurt became increasingly worried as he noticed his husband card his fingers through his hair endlessly. Kurt ran a hand down Blaine's back applying light pressure just to remind Blaine that they were doing this together and that it was nothing to be afraid.

As Kurt noticed the woman's form slide into the room, he removed his hand from Blaine's back and extended to the doctor.

"Nice to see you again Dr. Shoemake," Kurt greeted politely.

Blaine hadn't moved from his position and his eyes remained attached to a point on the floor and he hadn't even moved to greet the doctor.

Something was wrong.

_**What happened in the gym? Muhahaha**_

_**You should all go check out my one shot- "I would die for you" and tell me what you think, it is kind of sad but it was fun to right.**_

_**And Chandler will be getting some arm-candy. WOOT!**_

_**Question of the Day:**_

_**Does anyone else feel like they need to go into a group meeting and say:**_

"_**Hi I'm Ashley and I'm addicted to Glee."**_

_**I DO!**_


	19. Consequences

_**Next update won't be until Wednesday at least. My dad's birthday is on Tuesday and Im super busy tomorrow.**_

_**It's not what you think. Read ahead my lovelies and don't hate me forever.**_

_**Enjoy**_

Blaine had hit the gym after work. He felt safe in gym, a place where no one was judging him and he could relieve all the pent up frustrations. He changed into a muscle t-shirts and a dark grey pair of sweats and then took his place in front of the oh-so-familiar punching bag.

As he became lost in the sensation of slamming his fists into the compacted bag, he didn't sense the oncoming person.

Sebastian watched as Blaine's muscles contracted as he planted each punch in his target. Instead of feeling aroused by the scent of masculinity and Blaine, he could find no pleasure or joy in the scene. The fact that he was even there crippled his mind with guilt.

"Blaine." Sebastian breathed out depression obviously dripping off his voice.

Blaine spun quickly surprised by the ambush. His eyes quickly widened and contorted to show anger.

"Sebastian, get the hell-.."

"I'm not here to fight or to start anything; there is just something I have to tell you." Sebastian closed his eyes and his body visibly hung limp.

Blaine swirled his wrist as if asking the process to quicken. Sebastian's eyes however remained shut. He had no idea how to articulate the life altering sentences swimming in his brain.

"Blaine, I am HIV positive." Sebastian didn't look up or open his eyes.

"It didn't come from me; you probably got it from one of your other quick fucks." Blaine sneered, not picking up on the gravity of the situation

Sebastian sighed in frustration. Blaine didn't understand what he meant. "I know I didn't get it from you Blaine."

"Then what the fuck are you saying Sebastian?"

"Blaine I think I had it before we ,umm, hooked up. And-.." He paused: the guilt banging against his chest. "And we didn't use protection every time. And I think I could have given it to you."

Sebastian reached a hand out to touch Blaine's shoulder but retracted it when he saw the transformation of Blaine's eyes.

"I'm so sorry Blaine. It is best that you get tested and you should tell Kurt… I am sorry."

With that Sebastian left.

* * *

Blaine's world spun out of control, all the colors drained and the ticking of the clock faded out. He crumpled to his knees, tears leaking from his eyes. His emotions raged inside him, combating each other and wrenching his heart. His world was over. He beat his fists against the side of his head, torturing and condemning himself for his mistakes.

"Blaine, honey, what's wrong?" Kurt asked a twinge of concern piercing the question. Blaine still hadn't removed his stare from the floor and the room was full of palpable anxiety.

Blaine's mind was a swirl of Sebastian words. Nothing else existed. He acknowledged nothing else. He was numb, even the touch of Kurt wasn't enough to stir him from his quickly enclosing depression.

* * *

Dr. Shoemake asked to speak to Kurt in private to which Blaine responded with no protest.

They had been trying for the past 15 minutes to stir some type of answer from Blaine. If it hadn't been for his breathing you would have thought him dead.

"Kurt, has anything happened today to provoke this ..behavior?" She questioned, quite confused with the situation herself.

"Not that I know of, we had a great morning, and things have been going well. Unless something happened at work, but he would never bring that home with him."

The doctor shrugged in defeat and Kurt placed his head in his palms. Blaine was never reduced to this kind of silence. He just wanted to hear Blaine say something… anything.

The pair spent the next 5 minutes discussing possibilities but came up with nothing. They returned the tan room, to the same scene they had left. Blaine bent over his knees staring into the ground. He chest rose and fell softly with his breaths and the slight sound of sobs filled the room.

* * *

Kurt accosted his husband, kneeling down beside him. He slipped his hand over his upper thigh, rubbing gently back and forth.

"Blaine, I need you to talk to me. Please Blaine. I love you. Just talk to me."

Blaine sighed deeply and leaned backward sluggishly until his back hit against the cool leather of the loveseat. Kurt continued to rub his thigh lovingly, seeing that he was getting some type of result out of it.

"Doctor can you give us a minute?" Kurt asked.

The doctor respecting the pair gave them their space and slipped into the waiting room.

Kurt waited patiently, and didn't press for anything from Blaine. He just tried to comfort Blaine with his presence. He had never seen Blaine like this before. Frankly, it shook him to his core, but he wanted to be there for Blaine.

"Kurt." He choked out. "Sebastian is HIV postivie."

Kurt waited not seeing the significance in the sentence.

"He. He thinks… he was positive when.. we…. And we didn't use prot-.." Blaine couldn't finish his sentence but Kurt had understood. Kurt had moved to Blaine's side wrapping Blaine up in his arms, tears swelling in his own eyes.

"It's okay, we will get through this together." Kurt croaked out but he wasn't sure of that himself. Sobs released from both of their bodies.

Blaine was screaming "I'm sorry's" into Kurt's sweater and Kurt was trying to black out from the rush of sadness flowing through his veins.

"We'll be okay.. we'll be okay." Kurt cooed into Blaine's ear trying to convince himself of the words.

Would they be okay?

_**He is going to get tested. I feel bad for Sebastian…. Really I do.**_

_**This was so hard to write.**_


	20. Anger

_**Okay so my computer crashed and I just finally got it up and working… so sorry for the wait.**_

_**Enjoy… xoxox**_

Kurt's body went rigid against Blaine's. His breathing slowed and his heart thudded loudly.

_We had sex while he was cheating. Shit._

Kurt's mind spun into oblivion as Blaine continued to weep into his husband's shirt. The thought of where they were never even registered.

Kurt's conscience fought between anger and sympathy; however anger seemed to win.

The hand that had been on Blaine's shuddering back had stopped its gentle motions and now sat paralyzed on Blaine's spine.

Kurt's mouth was closed painfully, as if; he was trying to prevent himself from saying something.

The change in Kurt's demeanor had not gone unnoticed to Blaine. His husband was there, but not there. He was in his mind, fighting something, and fighting it strongly. Blaine continued to whisper apologies whilst tears flooded his eyes.

Blaine felt worse about the possibility that he could have ruined Kurt's life than his own.

_Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. All you do is destroy things. _

Blaine sat belittling himself internally while Kurt sat arguing with himself.

Aside for the muffled sobs from Blaine and deep, tense sighs from Kurt, the room sat silent, drowning them in their emotions.

* * *

Dr. Shoemake knew that the couple needed time, but their session time was quickly coming to a close. There was another appointment in just moments, so she made her way to the room. She stopped outside the door, hearing nothing but silence from the inside. She was unsure of how to basically kick them out.

As she entered the room, that was so familiar, she was taken aback by the sight of Kurt. He looked so different. His body upright and strong but yet he looked so broken. Many emotions played across his blue eyes.

"K-Kurt." She announced, clearing her throat, trying to rid it of the tension. "The session is almost over-."

Before she could finish the sentence, he rose from the loveseat, body still clenched. Blaine had returned to a sitting position and was making to stand up as well.

"Thank you for your time, doctor." Kurt thanked her. His voice strong and clear but trembling ever so slightly.

Blaine stood finally, quick and sharp breaths alerting the doctor of his fear. Blaine reached out for Kurt's hand longing to feel the reassurance of Kurt.

Kurt didn't flinch away but he did not meld his hand into Blaine's either. He allowed Blaine to grip on to his hand as he marched out of the room. Blaine trailed slowly, a couple steps behind his husband, his head down and his feet scrapping against the tile.

* * *

The car ride home was deafeningly silent. The only sounds were those of the car's engine and short whimpers of Blaine.

Kurt's grip on the steering wheel caused his knuckles to turn white and he didn't dare turn to face his husband.

Blaine had given up trying to talk to Kurt knowing that Kurt was doing his best to spare Blaine of the anger that he had building inside him. He could tell. He knew Kurt too well and as much as Kurt wanted to support Blaine, Blaine knew he was furious.

Blaine had collapsed into sleep. His mind was exhausted and his body was drained. His sleep was fitful. It was spent tossing and turning, searching for his husband, however, Kurt wasn't there.

* * *

The clock read midnight which meant Kurt had spent the last hour, standing in the middle of the living room just staring into their wedding photo. He stood statue like making no movements except for the slight rise and fall of his chest. Kurt suddenly swooped up the picture into his nimble fingers and glared into the memory.

In the flash of the eye, the picture frame had been thrown across the room, crashing into the wall and shattering. Kurt's eyes were ablaze with anger. He ran to the wall placing one hand one the wall where the picture had hit. He brushed his hand against it before paralyzing. His body convulsed into a sob and he crashed his fist into the wall, cracking open the wall and his knuckles. Blood stained the ghostly white walls. He stood with his fist inside the wall, panting heavily, tears streaming down his face, plummeting to the floor. He banged his other fist against the wall, screaming.

* * *

Blaine had woken since the first crash of the picture. He had wandered to the living room, looking for the source. He immediately regretted it. He saw Kurt or someone who looked like Kurt. He wasn't sure.

He watched as Kurt broke his knuckles into the wall, causing him to yelp in pain. Blaine wanted nothing more than to go over and comfort Kurt. But the only Blaine could do was stand in fear.

Kurt stood still momentarily before bending down to pick up the picture out of the glass shards. He cut himself a number of times but he didn't seem to care. He ran into the kitchen carrying the picture. He scrambled through the drawers, throwing a few things to the floor. When he finally found what he was looking for he raised the picture above his head, allowing Blaine (who, Kurt, still didn't know was there) the see the picture.

Kurt lit the match that he had obtained in his search and held it close to the picture. Kurt waited, what seemed like an endless minute and soon the picture was consumed with flames. He threw it carelessly to the sink, sinking down against the frig. His whole body trembled and he covers his face with his hands. He was sobbing uncontrollably and his hands shook dangerously.

* * *

Blaine gasped as Kurt held up the picture. It was a picture of their first dance together at their wedding. He noticed as the Kurt lit the match, bringing it close to the picture.

_No! Please Kurt!_

He mentally pleaded with Kurt, but it was too late, the picture was burning. Blaine ran the bathroom as vomit arrived in his mouth.

_**I know Kurt was like crazy in this, BUT I think it was more than just the HIV, he was really keeping everything bottled up. **_

_**I think there will be another 3-5 chapters depending.**_

_**Thanks to everyone who supported this.**_

_**I promise next chapter will be better… Like … cuddles and such **_


	21. Together

_**I am incredibly sorry for your long wait. I have been sickeningly busy with work and stuff, plus I had a little bit of writer's block. **_

_**In other news, I have reached 100 follows and nearly 100 reviews on this story. **_

_**I can't begin to tell you guys how much I appreciate all of you. Seriously, I think I wanna marry you :)**_

_**Anyway read on.**_

Kurt's sobs were heard through the apartment, as Blaine remained sick over the toilet. The bathroom was pitch-black and only the shadowy figure of a weak man hovered over the porcelain seat of the toilet, gave clue to the life in the room.

"I didn't mean to." He whimpered. His confession faded into his sobs and his mind was consumed with sadness.

* * *

Kurt's body still trembled slightly, as if a slight breeze remained over him. Tears caressed his cheeks before dropping off his face to the floor. His hands remained cupped, blocking his face from view. His knees were up near his chest. He looked like a child: a fragile, hurt child.

"I can't do this anymore." He whispered softly. With that left out in the open, he stood vibrantly, straightening his shoulders and setting his mouth in a curve-less line.

He walked over to the sink, accessing the damage with an emotionless eye. That was until he saw the burnt remnants of the photo. Ashes littered the floor and the flame seared photo laid charred and destroyed in the sink. _No. No.. no no no. _Tears crowded his eyes and his mouth turned down in a deep frown.

_In sickness and in health_

The memories of his wedding played over and over again in his already aching mind.

_For better or for worse. Until death do us part._

"Blaine." Kurt choked out, longing for his husband.

It was then he heard the sobs of his husband coming for the nearest bathroom. He stumbled towards the room containing Blaine. The whole house was dark and eerily cold. Dark shapes lead Kurt to the bathroom. He breath caught in his throat and his palms started sweating. He cautiously approached the scene, opening the door slightly.

Blaine immediately knew who the presence was and the scene sprang to life.

Blaine didn't even look up. He simply sobbed louder whispering broken apologizes.

"I've destroyed the only thing I have ever loved." Was the only sentence that Blaine had managed to force out. He wasn't just talking about the HIV, he was talking about the affair.

Kurt's heart broke into pieces.

Blaine continued to ramble on. Apologies and sentiments spewed from his mouth and tears crashed to the floor.

"Blaine." Kurt interrupted. For the first time Blaine lifted his eyes to meet Kurt's. Pain, hurt, guilt and _hope _played across Blaine's eyes. "I- Blaine- I forgive you."

Blaine shut his mouth in awe. He dropped his eyes again his tone turning foreign and hard. "Why?"

Kurt flinched a bit at the sound of Blaine's voice. "Because-." Kurt attempted to explain but was cut short by Blaine.

"I don't deserve it. I don't deserve you." Blaine voice cracked and returned to the previous inflection it had. "You would be so much better off without me."

"Blaine. You are so wrong. I am nothing without you. I tried, really tried to leave and to move on, but I can't and I will never be able to, because I-I- I love you... Because of and in spite of your flaws. Can I forget what you did? Will it ever be okay?" Blaine's heart dropped to his feet. "No, probably not, but- I can't imagine a life without you. I meant what I said when I said I would stand by you. I will. It is no different now. Together, we can do this." Kurt breathed in deeply, averting his gaze to Blaine. "Together, forever. Till death do us part." Kurt leant down placing his hand under Blaine chin pulling it to face him. He surged forward, his breath momentarily hovering over Blaine's lips before meeting in a kiss of desperation. Regrets, secrets, angers, pains poured out of the men and into the kiss, but the love between the husbands drown them.

Blaine pulled back for air momentarily, taking the moment to murmur something against Kurt's lips.

Kurt's heart melted when the words graced his ears. "Till death do us part."

* * *

Kurt pulled Blaine into his arms as the shorter man, dropped off into sleep. He draped his arm over Blaine's waist, to which the shorter man instinctively wrapped their hands together.

For the first time in months, Kurt smiled: a real smile, his eyes bright and full of hope and love. A single tear glistened as it streamed down his face. A tear of happiness, not pain or hatred, like he was accustom to.

He nuzzled into Blaine's curls, breathing in the scent of his husband. He gently kissed the back of his neck, reassuring his husband of his presence.

"Tomorrow, Blaine, we will face this together. No matter what, I … love you." Kurt spoke to a nearly unconscious Blaine. Blaine smiled smally as he slipped into complete sleep.

Kurt followed him into sleeps, clutching tightly the other man emanating heat in the bed. His dreams were peaceful and playful and no horrors of Sebastian or Chandler or HIV slipped into his dreams.

Things were perfect.

For now.

_**Almost to the end my friends. Almost. **_

_**Anyway so gossip about season 4. Let's go. I know for a fact there is an episode called "The breakup" and lets just say I hope that Rachel does hog that episode. My poor heart can't take it, if Klaine breaks up.**_

_**Also really happy to see that Kurt is also getting a happier plot for season 4. I dont want to see him cry. I mean Chris does a fabulous job with a sad Kurt but let's see him smile.**_

_**For all crisscolfer fans out there. "I always feel like Darren's mouth is on mine." /fangirling **_


	22. NOT A CHAPTER

_**I cant do a link because FF wont let me BUT go to youtube. and type The Klaine "box scene" in the search bar. Then die in happiness**_

_**Go now.**_

_**Klaine box scene**_

_**I died.**_

_**Just go **_

_**leave to drown in my tears**_


	23. The way it was

_**Okay, it took me forever but here it is. **_

_**Enjoy xoxx and pardon any poor grammar or spelling mistakes**_

Sunlight trickled into the room through the blinds, waking the taller man from his sleep. Kurt rolled slightly gaining his competence before opening his eyes fully. He looked down at the olive skinned man still lying in his clutches, his eyes closed peacefully and his mouth tugged upwards in a smile. Kurt felt the waves of Blaine's heartbeat as he let the sound wash over him. It was the picture of serenity and love.

"Blaine." Kurt sang softly into the curls of his husband's head.

Blaine stirred slightly at the sound of Kurt's voice.

"Come on Blaine, wake up, we have to be there at 9." And all the serenity fell apart.

Blaine tenses, anxiety evident in his sudden change of demeanor. Blaine's mouth falls open in an endless rushed dialogue of 'I love you's' and 'I'm sorry's'. Kurt tried to calm the babbling man with soft calm movements but Blaine was inconsolable.

"Blaine, please just get up and get ready, love." Kurt spoke in a gentle, melodic tone, hoping to ease the man into some state of relaxation.

Blaine finally sighs deeply, his shoulders dropping and his whole body crumpling into jelly.

"There you go. Now let's get ready." Kurt trills.

Kurt is trying to remain calm and supportive and strong but to be honest he is scared shitless.

After a brief and shockingly short time of preparing for the day, the pair made their way to their car in an uncomfortable, yet all too familiar, silence.

As Kurt pulled from the driveway, he placed his knee gently on Blaine's knee. His hand slotted perfectly over the shorter man, like a puzzle piece.

The drive continued in prolonged silence as the two took to their own thoughts.

Blaine was the one to break the silence. "I know. I know I treated you like shit. I know you deserve so much better than me and I still don't know why you stay but- but I love you." His tone was sorrowful and meaningful tipped with regret.

"I love you only means so much when your actions don't back it up." Shit. He regretted it the moment he said it. Was he still mad? Had he truly not forgiven him? "Blaine." He interjected after noticing Blaine's head fall in defeat. "I'm trying. I am really trying. I don't want to lose you and as much as I want to walk away I know I never can." He knew that much was true. He could never walk away. It would hurt much more to leave than to stay. But this decision shouldn't be about which hurts less.

"My head and my heart are at war and I do forgive you. I do. But it just doesn't feel like it isn't enough. I'm sorry Blaine I am trying to be honest with you and with myself."

"But Kurt love is enough. And you love me." Blaine added meekly.

"I do love you, but what's that say about what I think of myself?" Kurt replied sharply, tears falling.

"Don't I deserve more?" Kurt questioned.

Blaine had no response.

* * *

The wait at the clinic was agonizingly long which only added to the tension in the atmosphere.

After each one of them tested separately then came the task of waiting. The hardest part about it. Kurt was freely crying. Worried about the results. Worried about his marriage. Blaine wrapped their fingers together, sparking heat between them.

He leaned in, his whisper licking the side of Kurt's ear. "You do deserve more. And I will be more. Every day of my life until I can prove that I am what you deserve or I will die trying. You are my world, Kurt. Bu-But you deserve someone who thought that from the beginning, and if you have to say goodbye, then know that I will regret my mistake forever and I will love you until the day I die."

Kurt curled into Blaine overtaken by emotions. He sobbed into his husband for quite a bit of time before a doctor stepping in front of them.

"Mr. and Mr. Anderson-Hummel?" They nodded in response. "I have your results. If you will just follow me?" The doctor directed before leading them into a back room.

"Would you like to find out together?" The doctor asked, solemnly.

Kurt nodded in retaliation and Blaine nodded as well.

Kurt clenched his hand around Blaine's while Blaine's eyes widened in anticipation.

"Kurt. Blaine. You have both tested… negative for HIV." Breathes were released and hearts lightened. "However…" Another breath was held. "Blaine you tested positive for Syphilis." Blaine's faced drained and his head pounded. "Blaine this is a very, very treatable disease and if taken care of will not affect you anymore than it already has. We caught it pretty early. I will have the receptionist set up a follow appointment for your treatment. But other than that, you are free to go Mr. and Mr. Anderson-Hummel. Ohh, one last thing. I do ask you refrain from sexual intercourse for the time being." He left them to sit in the room by themselves. Blaine was feeling a bit heavy with the news of his sickness but yet he felt trivially light and airy.

"We are going to be okay." Kurt dared to say. A smile almost spread across his face. He pulled Blaine to his feet after him before crushing him against the wall and kissing him. Tongue pushing into Blaine's mouth and rediscovering the territory. It was the first time since the affair he felt the butterflies in his stomach and felt like he would melt under the touch of his husband, who now hand his hands in Kurt's hair. Blaine pushed off Kurt remembering they were in a semi-public place and his blood was rushing south embarrassingly fast.

"I love you. Love may not be enough, but it is a sure starting point." Kurt said optimistically.

Blaine smiled the smile that Kurt remembered from high school. It was the smile that made him fall in love with Blaine. And it was the smile that made him fall in love all over again.

_**This will contain rants and/or spoilers. **_

_**The Klaine break-up... I was so upset. I cry for like 4 hours. /sigh They can't they just can't.**_

_**26 days guys. I have been fangirling over CrissColfer and Klaine way to much. **_

_**My otp 3 **_


	24. Dying Day

_**Okay so I could come up with some pretty convincing excuses as to why this is sooooo late but I'm to lazy so my apologies for the wait. Also, I was planing on some more angst but I thought we have had enough of that, so some happy stuff yea? So next chapter is the last one, then I will move on to finishing my other fic which I have seriously neglected... I am horrible. Anyway for all of you who have stuck with me, words can't describe my appreciation, you inspire me to write. Read the bottom for rants and feels 3  
****Anyway  
****Enjoy my lovelies xoxoxoxox**  
_

_6 months later_

"Blaine, wake up." Kurt echoed from across the room. His foot propped against the wall, his hair perfectly coiffed and his outfit meticulous.

Blaine's messy curls popped up from underneath the bed, followed by his unshaven face and tired eyes.

"Good morning." Kurt added quite sarcastically. Blaine was not amused. He shot Kurt the most annoyed face he could muster this early in the morning before looking to the clock.

"Six….. Thirty. No. Nope. Not going to happen. Good night." Blaine said in absolute defiance.

"Oh come on. Please Blaine." Kurt voice was soft and gentle, the way he knew Blaine couldn't resist.

Blaine just scoffed rolling on to his side.

"Baby, please."

_Damn you._

"I hate you." He joked before swinging his feet around and jumping out of bed. "Do I have to get dressed too?" He quipped sadly.

"That's not necessary, I like this view." Blaine was shirtless with sweat pants that sat low on his hips. "Delicious." Blaine smirked, his mind slowly waking up.

"Don't look too bad yourself, gorgeous." He growled sauntering over to his husband.

Kurt pulled Blaine in by his waist covering Blaine's lips with his own. Blaine brought his hand up to Kurt's hair, to which Kurt hissed.

_Damn it Blaine, I just did it._

Kurt pulled away and Blaine tried to follow after his lips. He whimpered when he couldn't find them. Kurt giggled slightly at the reaction. He led Blaine downstairs, hands intertwined.

The house was dark and serene, a slight glow coming for the dining room.

"Kurtttt." Blaine sighed out, breathless from the view. The walls were covered with pictures of them since their high schools year. The table lined with candles, a delicious breakfast sitting in the middle.

Kurt squeezed his hand before turning to face him.

"Every single one of those pictures proves why I am the happiest man alive. Happy anniversary, Blaine. I know we aren't perfect. But I would rather be the most imperfect person alive than spend one second without you. I love you. I don't know if I tell you that enough. I love your smile. I love your hair. I love your taste. I love the way you follow after my lips when we stop kissing. I love your arms around me. I love you… you. Forever, in spite of anything that has or may happen, I will love you until my dying day."

Tears rolled down Blaine's cheeks. "Kurt-I." He was rendered speechless.

_Never knew I could feel like this  
Like I've never seen the sky before  
Want to vanish inside your kiss  
Everyday I love you more and more  
Listen to my heart, can you hear it sings  
Telling me to give you everything  
Seasons may change winter to spring  
But I love you until the end of time_

Come what may, come what may  
I will love you until my dying day

Suddenly the world seems such a perfect place  
Suddenly it moves with such a perfect grace  
Suddenly my life doesn't seem such a waste  
It all revolves around you

And there's no mountain too high no river too wide  
Sing out this song and I'll be there by your side  
Storm clouds may gather and stars may collide  
But I love you until the end of time

Come what may, come what may  
I will love you until my dying day  
Oh come what may, come what may  
I will love you

Suddenly the world seems such a perfect place...

Come what may, come what may  
I will love you until my dying day

Kurt sang his heart out. No music playing just his voice. His soft pure voice while he stared at Blaine. His husband. The love of his life.

"Kurt. I love you." Blaine formed the only sentence he could.

The months after the affair had been hard. More tears had been shed. Loud arguments had been heard. Sleepless nights were had. Regret was felt. Guilt was held. Kurt had run from intimacy for a while, afraid to face the despairingly true fact that it was something that was no longer just shared between Blaine and Kurt. But the love was theirs'. No one else's. No one else had that love or that connection or that meaning. It still hurt Kurt sometimes, when he thought about it too hard and Blaine's heart still felt heavy with regret when he remembered it but the past was eventually and slowly forgotten or at least starting to be forgotten. They learned to live for the moment they were in. That was full of love and passion and plenty of desire.

Kurt led Blaine to table where he instructed him to sit. Breakfast was shared over loving glances and muttered 'I love you's'. Blaine watched Kurt, reveling in the gentle glow of his sweet pale skin and the radiance that his eyes had when they meet his and how his heart just melted when Kurt looked at him. The serene environment was stirred to life when Kurt left momentarily, coming back with a small square piece of paper in his hand. He handed it to Blaine, no words exchanged. Blaine quirked an eyebrow being reading.

_**You are formally invited to the vow renewal of:**_

_**Blaine Anderson-Hummel**_

_**and**_

_**Kurt Anderson-Hummel **_

Blaine tried to control his gasped but failed.

"I thought we could try again." Kurt whispered. He wasn't angry or trying to relive the painful past he was just trying to show his love.

Blaine was crying, after everything he had put Kurt through, he stilled loved him.

"Blaine, don't cry, no more tears. Enough of those." Kurt trilled, wiping the tears from Blaine's cheek, trailing his finger down his lover's face before ghosting them over his lips.

"I just. I don't. I love you." He stuttered at a loss for coherent thought.

"I love you, too and I thought we could try and finally move on."

"I would love that."

"Now enough tears. I wonder what normal couples do on their anniversary." Kurt teased coming to rest on Blaine's lap tangling his arms around Blaine's neck.

"Hmmm, I am not really sure, maybe you could teach me." Blaine mocked stupidly.

"It would be my pleasure." Kurt said, shaking slightly, from pure emotion. Kurt sank forward and caught Blaine in a hungry kiss, swiping his tongue along Blaine's bottom lip asking for permission, which was easily granted. Blaine moaned into the kiss, resulting in a shiver from Kurt.

Blaine swept Kurt up in bridal style carrying him swiftly to the bedroom, closing the door tightly before backing Kurt against it.

"Please Kurt, make love to me." Blaine begged.

Kurt whimpered a concurrence and slowly pushed Blaine onto the bed, Sebastian, Syphilis and the stained promises the last thing on their mind.

_**So I know we have all seen the first episode and some of us have heard the spoilers SO IF YOU HAVENT, DONT READ  
**__**If Klaine breaks up, I hope we see some angsty songs and scenes wooo. And I am super thrilled about Kurt's move to NY and his job at Vogue. /giggle.  
First episode was a little disappointing, in my opinion, but not bad. Still a gleek.**_


	25. I am yours You are mine

The sunlight reflected off the water, reaching the white arch where Blaine stood, wrapped in pale seashell fabric Blaine prepared to see Kurt. He looked out at the sea of white chairs, spotting the vibrant smile of Burt. He listened to the calm breaths of the officiator, while his palms began sweating. Blaine felt uneasy and he couldn't really pinpoint why. He felt uncharacteristically anxious and a small sense of panic seemed to be flooding his brain. His thoughts were however interrupted and his heart stopped when Kurt came into view dressed in a tight fitting black tailored suit, outlining his slender build perfectly. Kurt glided elegantly to stand on the right of Blaine, grinning largely the entire way. He reached Blaine and slipped his hand into his.

And then Blaine saw it. It all flashed back. All of it.

The overheard call to the divorce lawyer, the day he thought he would have rather been dead. Kurt hadn't wanted him anymore. He had pushed Kurt to divorce him.

"_Yes, Mr. Martin I'm looking for divorce lawyer."_

"_I'm afraid so. My marriage may be over." _

_Kurt nodded._

"_No, I haven't talked to him yet and frankly I don't particularly want to, but I'll be sure to, I just wanted to get some information first."_

"_Yes. Mhmm yes. Thank you Mr. Martin I'll be sure to call."_

_Blaine cowered in the hall sitting parallel to the office where Kurt had called Mr. Martin. He hated himself._

Blaine zoned out recalling the horrific moments, his surroundings suddenly making no sense as he remembers the trip to the therapist's office when he noticed the absence of Kurt's ring.

"_Hey Kurt it's good to see you."_

"_You too." Kurt answered waving his hand in Blaine's direction _

_Blaine's heart sank. Kurt's left hand was bare. The ring that symbolizes their love and commitment and THEM was gone. Blaine went cold all the life being sucked out of him and for the first time he really thought that it might be over. _

'Kurt didn't love me anymore.

Why should he?

That ring had meant nothing, I had taken it off when I was with Sebastian.'

When he realized how much he broke Kurt. How much he had hurt him. Blaine's breathing had become short and harsh as his eyes darted around trying to swim out of the drowning memories.

"_Are you happy Blaine? Is this want you wanted? I feel unwanted and unloved and useless. I feel ugly and stupid. Did you win, did you finally win?"_

_Kurt broke down into sobs shying away from Blaine's gaze. _

"_Kurt." Blaine whispered. Blaine had done this. He had broken the love of his life._

"_No just go."_

"_Kurt."_

"_Please, just go. You win."_

'I made him hate me. I destroyed him. I broke his heart'

Kurt noticed. There was storm in Blaine's eyes that frightened him. His stature had become tense and stiff. His left hand shook slightly as it always did when Blaine was troubled. Kurt still knew Blaine after everything, he could still tell, Blaine was suffocating next to him. By his breaths, by his eyes, by his hands, but mostly because there was no smile, his lips just quavered slightly, but the quavered out of fear not out of happiness.

He trailed his hand up Blaine's arm as the officiator trailed on with the open ceremonies. Usually Kurt's touch was enough to calm Blaine. Kurt presence soothed Blaine, reminding him he is not alone.

"Don't." Kurt whispered. "Stay."

Blaine met his eyes quickly and with a slight shake he averted his gaze to the water. He felt an almost unnerving sense of panic form in the pit of his stomach. He wanted nothing more than to run away but he tried to stay, for Kurt's sake. He didn't think Kurt could handle any more heartache.

The officiator starting to speak out about the memories of Kurt and Blaine, like the first time they met at Dalton and the memories they held with happiness in their wedding and then Blaine broke. All the happiness haunted Blaine. He closed his eyes unable to view the scene. But when he closed his eyes all he saw was the monster he thought he was, the monster that stole all the happiness away from Kurt. Why had he cheated? Why had he broken the one thing that made life worth living? He couldn't bear to be there, or with Kurt, or with anyone, or with himself.

He ran blindly, vanishing from the scenery and the white chairs, stumbling slightly on sand, causing him to hit the ground. He clutched the sand between his fists, longing for something to tether him to reality. He arrived at the beach house, unsure of how he got there. He reached the porch house breathing raggedly unable to think coherently. He clutched the railing doubling over in sobs as the war inside continued to rage on.

Kurt stood momentarily shocked and bewildered, his jaw hanging slightly. He quickly took in the surprised faces of the audience and the sad smiles of Burt and Carole as he looked to them. Kurt knew Blaine. He knew why Blaine had run and he knew that Blaine needed him now more than ever. He quickly pursued the shorter man, desperately searching for the track Blaine left, sorrow and sympathy flashing across his face.

He frantically searched for the white suited man, but to no avail, he could not find him. He trekked toward the beach house to wait for Blaine to return and as he neared the beach house, he heard the muffled cries of Blaine. His heart skipped a beat and he sprinted up the stairs and stopped dead in his tracks.

His heart broke.

Blaine kneeled facing away from him still clutching the rail on the porch, his back heaving in quiet sobs and quiet words pouring out of his mouth.

"I don't deserve him. I don't deserve this."

Kurt sighed heavily, his eyes crowding with tears. He moved quietly and slowly, approaching the scared man with caution and understanding. He moved only a centimeter or two before Blaine sobbed again. He froze

"Blaine." He nearly whimpered, all of his previous energy gone from seeing the man he loved so broken.

Blaine turned slowly, unaware that Kurt had been standing. He sniffled loudly trying to reign in the tears. He wiped his eyes sloppily and straightened his posture trying to confirm that he was in fact 'okay.' But Kurt knew better. Of course Kurt knew better.

"I know you're afraid." Kurt whispered with no emphasis just a solid look into Blaine's eyes. He inched forward again, trying to give Blaine space.

Blaine just looked at him, his eyes glazed over, completely dead. Kurt moved forward ever so slowly. And then Kurt reached him. He reached one hand out to simply touch his shoulder, to bring him back to reality. He moved his hand down his arm. And then Blaine fell to the ground Kurt catching him in his arms. Blaine flinched away and Kurt gave him his space, opting just to keep a hand on Blaine's wrist. Slowly Blaine moved closer to Kurt, the magnetic draw bringing him in.

"Hold me." He begged nearly inaudibly.

And Kurt did. He held him as a new wave of tears hit. He rocked him gently back and forth, humming into his hair until the tears relinquished a bit. And then Blaine looked up at Kurt.

"I'm afraid to keep hurting you. I don't deserve you. I can't promise I will never hurt again. I love you too much to hurt you." Blaine babbled out through his soft tears.

Kurt reached out and brushed his hand along Blaine's cheek while he held Blaine.

"Blaine love is not what you can predict. Love is messy and love hurts. Maybe love doesn't stay, maybe love can't, and maybe love shouldn't. All I know is that I want you for as long as love will stay and when love must leave, the door is always open. I want whatever you have to give. And I want all the hurt that comes with it."

Blaine froze for a mere second before crashing forwards to cover Kurt's lips with his own. Blaine sobbed onto Kurt's chest, tears once again streaming down his cheeks. The words sunk into Blaine's heart, exploding inside of him making his ears ring and his hands shake.

They both stood slowly, Kurt continuing to somehow keep some physical touch on Blaine. Blaine leaned back into Kurt once standing.

"I won't ever let you go." Kurt whispered.

And then the rain started. Gray clouds slid over the sky, darkening the beach.

"Rain will wash away everything if you let it." Kurt hummed gently.

Blaine looked up into the rain pellets, appreciating the cold sting as it hit his face. His mind calmed as tears still flowed down his cheeks. He felt Kurt's warm breath against his cheek. Kurt wrapped his arms around Blaine, reassuring Blaine of his presence. And the rain did wash it all away. He shook in Kurt's arms as he cried. The rain ran down both of them collecting at their feet and trailing off. Kurt kissed his hair, comforting the shorter man. Blaine felt every touch of the rain, every cleansing drop. And he let go. Let go of everything, the fights, the arguments, the fear, the pain, the brokenness and the self-hatred.

"The past is washed away, all we have is this new future and I want more than anything to share it with you." Kurt murmured

"I want that." Blaine responded nuzzled farther into Kurt

"I love you." Kurt said softly, running his hands over Blaine's back.

"I love me too." Blaine said meeting Kurt's eyes with a much more vibrant hazel. "But I love you more."

Kurt slipping their hands together, "Do you still want to marry me, again?" Blaine answered with a kiss.

Kurt turned towards him. "Promise me something, Blaine," Blaine nodded "Forgive yourself." Blaine cast his eyes away but Kurt quickly caught Blaine's chin in his hand, bringing hazel to meet blue. "I have and I love you all the same. I hope you love you as much as I do." A tear slipped from Blaine's eye crashing to the porch.

'_I do forgive myself'_

And with that the rain kept pouring trailing down their faces and mixing on the ground, carrying away all the pain with it. Blaine fell into Kurt exhausted and Kurt just simply held him for a while, as the rain continued to fall.

Kurt rubbed small circles into Blaine's back and looked out to see all the wedding guests evacuating the beautiful scene. He looked back to find Blaine smiling at him, his body in extremely close proximity to his. Kurt felt arousal sweep over him. He yanked Blaine forward by the collar, completely disregarding the importance of the clothes. He smashed their lips together, sliding his tongue along Blaine's lower lip, eliciting a low moan from the back of Blaine's throat. Blaine firmly grabbed Kurt's hips guiding them backwards into the beach house. The entered the house completely soaked and entangled.

"You are my inspiration and my soul's fire." Kurt said, capturing Blaine's lips in a desperate kiss, his hands beginning to strip the dripping blazer from his shoulders.

"In your eyes I have found a home." Blaine echoed smiling against Kurt's lips as Kurt made a quick move to unbuttoned Blaine's shirt

Blaine guided them to the bedroom, Kurt attacking and mouthing at his neck. He moved his mouth to Blaine's ear, breath shallowly. "You are the magic of my days, you help me laugh and you teach me love."

Blaine grinned widely before, closing the bedroom door behind them, starting to undress Kurt.

"In your heart, I have found my love. In your soul I have found my mate." He responded leaning up to kiss him soundly.

"You provide a safe place for me, unlike I've ever known. You free me to sing my own song. You are more of an amazement to me, each day I rediscover you." He moved his hands to tangle in Blaine's curls. "You are my greatest boon."

"With you I am whole, full, alive. You make me laugh. You let me cry. You are my breath." Blaine breathed heavily into Kurt's ear before continuing. "My every heartbeat.

They linked hands in front of them and continued their vows together.

"I am yours. You are mine. Of this we are certain. You are lodged in my heart. The small key is lost. You must stay there forever." Their voices trailed off and their eyes locked together, their hands shivering from the power of the words spoken.

They had remembered the vows word for word.

The connection between them surged and they meet for a hungry kiss. They shed their finally layers, the love pulsating between them. "Make love to me." Blaine whimpered.

Kurt pushed him forward onto the bed, a happy tear falling from his face before he climbed on top of him.

…

They felt each other's heartbeats and slowly the synchronized together and finally they felt like one. Like they had so long ago, the felt like the puzzle pieces finally slid together and the picture it formed was breath taking. Blaine sighed happily watching the sunset outside as the rain let up and he felt Kurt snoring on his chest and he drifted off to sleep, with reality far better than his dreams.

_**So yikes, it took me like 7 years to update. I have several excuses I could give you like, work, school and being grounded but those are just excuses I am so sorry for being so undevoted to this. I will eventually start a new story but time is very limited for me right now. **_

_**Also a huge thanks to AlwaysKlaine for putting up with me and betaing my stuff. **_

_**I hoped you enjoyed the story. This the last chapter, *sob*. It was a long ride and I loved every minute**_

_**As for Glee as of right now, I have kind of lost my love for it right now, and when Blaine actually did end up cheating it hurt my heart.**_


End file.
